Should we stop saying how busy we are?

A NEW Age speaker has sparked debate by arguing we should stop telling each other how “busy” we are. Here’s what you should say instead.

STOP telling people you’re busy.

When they ask, “How are you?”, you should instead reply, “Looking for opportunities”, according to New Age author Deepak Chopra and former investment banker and music producer Kabir Sehgal.

Writing for CNBC, the pair argued “constantly harping about your busyness” can actually have negative consequences. “Everyone is busy,” they said.

“Your calendar doesn’t make you special. So don’t go around saying, ‘I’m busier than you’ or comparing your schedule to others. If you’re trying to stand out in your business career, you’re not going to separate from the pack by telling folks how busy you are.

“Instead of being a badge of success, busyness may send the signal to your enlightened colleagues and associates that you aren’t working smart.”

They also warn it may be seen as bragging. “When you tell people about the millions of things going on, you might be sending the message, ‘Look at all my obligations and responsibilities. I am productive, industrious, accomplished and successful.’,” they said.

“By sharing with others that you’re so busy, you inevitably place the focus on yourself and invite the attention and recognition of others.

“Moreover, when folks ask ‘How are you?’ and you respond ‘I’m busy’, you might be signalling that you don’t want to talk to them.

“Instead of telling people how hectic and hardworking you are, take the time to ask them questions. You can always make time to get to know people, create friendships and deepen relationships.”

Most importantly, however, they argue busyness “closes doors”.

“When people think you’re too busy, they won’t present you with opportunities,” they said. “You want people thinking of you when a truly amazing opportunity emerges. You may have heard the mantra, ‘If you want something done, give it to a busy person.’

“Indeed, let people know that you will make time for important things. When folks ask, ‘How are you?’ you can respond by saying, ‘Looking for opportunities.’ This response will no doubt spark a deeper conversation that could lead to more and better prospects.”

On LinkedIn, the piece attracted nearly 2000 comments as professionals weighed in. “Interesting how people say they are ‘so busy’ as if it was a compliment about their lives,” wrote Gregory Segal. “I really feel sorry for people that won’t take time out to smell the roses. It’s all about the journey not the destination.”

Dan Osetek added, “I never tell anyone professional, personal or otherwise how busy I am. Instead, I honestly convey an expectation of priority. Saying you are too busy, implies you are busier than someone else, which you can’t really believe because, do you really know everyone else’s life? Simply prioritise rather than proclaim you are too busy.”

Yvonne Parnell said “I’m so busy” had just become part of the corporate and even everyday vernacular. “It is so prevalent it has become pretty much a meaningless response,” she said. “If we accept everyone is busy — all of the time — then I agree its time to change the language.”

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Originally published as Should we stop saying how busy we are?