The Beast of Bondi: Keith Simms’ rape victim breaks her silence

Jay was a happy-go-lucky teenager on a night out with friends when she became one of the Beast of Bondi’s first victims - an attack that left her pregnant. Here is her story.

‘Jay’ was just a normal happy-go-lucky teenager on a night out with friends in 1986 when she became one of the first victims of the Beast of Bondi — an attack that left her pregnant.

It took her 20 years to report the crime, after reading in The Daily Telegraph that police were reinvestigating the attacks.

Here is Jay’s story

JAY’S STORY:

I was with friends in Bondi, I was just 16. I was doing  a martial arts class  with a couple of friends. I think we went to Bondi to get pizza when my girlfriend wanted a bit of time alone in her boyfriend’s vehicle. So I went for a walk.  I was just walking on the beach when he came up behind and held a serrated knife at my neck and assaulted me.

Even though I’d just done a martial arts class I couldn’t use it to save myself. I can’t even remember what time it happened,  but it was night-time.

I went into complete shock.  I managed to get back to the van but I was just really quiet and just went home. I didn’t tell people for a long time.

My behaviour started to waiver and my mother was like “What‘s wrong, why are you acting this way?’’ she asked over and over.

A rape victim of Keith Simms’ has broken her silence.

So I went down a sort of self sabotage in a sort of way, getting myself into trouble with alcohol and that sort of stuff. My behaviour just changed and my mother knew something was wrong.

It was many months later before I told anyone, many months, I can’t remember how long but I ended up getting pregnant from this (and I) went and had an abortion.

I did all that on my own. I didn’t tell anyone. What provoked me in the end is my mother wanted me to see a counsellor. She just kept saying “Something’s going on’’ because out of nowhere my behaviour just changed. I wasn’t myself, I was quiet, I wouldn’t talk. I was being a brat.

Jay fell pregnant after she was raped by the Beast of Bondi. File picture

So I saw this counsellor who advised me to tell my mother and father … so I told my mum and she was beside herself, absolutely beside herself and reacted the way you would want a parent to react.

And on her death bed, she grabbed my hand and said “I’m so sorry I didn’t save you … I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you”.

She kept saying it. On her death bed that’s what was worrying her. I told her, “It’s ok Mum, I turned out all right despite it all”.

I felt better about being able to talk to my mum about it but at no point did I go to the police or do anything.

 I was just too scared and in shock about what had happened. I was worried that I wouldn’t be believed.

And when I found out I was pregnant, I thought “I have to get rid of this” but now I think that would have been DNA that could have helped the investigation. At my age then, I wasn’t thinking straight and was so traumatised.

It was years before I could tell my mum about the abortion. It’s part of the guilt I have, not going to police. I didn’t know any better and my shock prevented me from speaking up and doing anything and then all these other women came after me and all their lives have been affected and been changed. I have some guilt around that.

A NSW Police breakthrough identified Keith Simms as a serial rapist.

I hit a fork in the road, and I was about to go down a road, even prostitution. I gave up school and somehow I got myself into a job and I ended up at a massage parlour in Redfern or somewhere. I did one massage ... and I froze and just left immediately. And that was like the fork in the road for me.

 I asked myself, “What am I doing? Am I going to let this get on the top of me or am I going to fight my way through?’’

 I decided to take the harder road.  I fought and enrolled in TAFE and did my HSC. I found education was the way through my trauma.

I ended up marrying someone I met in the education system and have a wonderful supportive daughter.

 Look, life has been difficult, but I have managed to get through it.  

I am now involved in social services where I can help people. I think what happened to me has helped me deal with people who are in dark places.

I got the call a couple of months ago and the detective said they had caught the person but unfortunately he was dead.

I honestly felt relief that he was dead. I’m not one of those that felt we had missed out on justice … he’s dead, good, he can’t hurt anyone else.  

I’m not normally a horrible person but I hope he suffered.