Aussie parents explain why their kids have no social media, phone at home as schools ban them

There are growing calls to limit over-use of mobile phones as an Aussie father and ex-NRL wife reveal why their kids do not have phones at home, as schools ban the device.

Parents who have seen the positive impact the school mobile ban has had on their kids, should extend it when they get home, say a campaign group fighting to end phone-based childhoods.

The Heads Up Alliance, a grassroots group whose aim is to delay children having a phone or access to social media for as long as possible, believe children are happier and healthier when they are not bombarded by negative and dangerous content on social media 24/7.

The group is also backing the Let Them Be Kids campaign to raise the age of when children can access social media to 16.

Father-of-five Dany Elachi, co-founder of The Heads Up Alliance, said parents were on the frontline at home and wants politicians to listen and support their wishes for action.

Mobile phones are tempting young Aussies to stay up at night and lose sleep.

Last week he spoke to the select committee looking into social media impacts on Australians, where he said he felt heard and hoped his views would help lead to change around social media access for kids.

“Parents are not buying it,” he told the committee. “We are the ones at the coalface, seeing the harms with our own eyes playing out in real time.”

Mr Elachi, who has five kids who are not allowed to have smart phones or social media until they are at least 16, perhaps older, said when they gave their eldest daughter one of their old phones aged 10 she immediately became obsessed to the point she was sending messages in bed late at night.

Dany and Cynthia Elachi, with their daughter Aalia, at home. Aalia is not allowed social media or a phone. Picture: Justin Lloyd.

“It was stopping her from socialising with the family and even sleeping,” Mr Elachi said.

When the phone broke they decided not to replace it.

They saw an immediate improvement in their daughter’s behaviour.

Mr Elachi said it can be scary for parents to delay smartphones for their kids, but with growing evidence of the harm, he said it is worth doing, and not as hard as people fear, especially if they form alliances with other like-minded families in their communities.

“We are learning that tech companies deliberately design apps to addict them,” he said.

“We are also learning that the compulsive use of social media is increasingly linked to rising rates of youth depression, self-harm and suicide.”

Parents want mobile phone bans at schools to extend to the home.

He said in the classrooms teachers are noticing pupils have a better focus without phones nearby, and in the schoolyard, it means friends are socialising face-to-face and playing sports.

He said the benefits were being spoken about by both children, teachers and parents.

“The NSW Premier told me it was the best thing his government has ever done,” Mr Elachi said.

In August the SA Government released data showing there had been a 63 per cent decline in critical incidents involving social media in terms 1 and 2 of 2024 – compared to the same period in 2023, before the ban was in place.

It also found there were 54 per cent fewer behavioural issues in the first half of 2024, compared with the same period the year before.

Following the release of the research the Heads Up Alliance launched a petition to introduce a phone ban in all Catholic and independent schools.

AUSSIE FAMILY ‘DEEPLY CONCERNED’ WITH SOCIAL MEDIA

Former NRL player Justin O’Neill and his wife Chantelle say they are “deeply concerned” about the negative effects of social media.

That’s why their daughters Giselle, 8, and Kasia, 6, won’t be getting smartphones anytime soon.

“We’ve recently seen in the news the devastating consequences of online environments,” Mrs O’Neill said.

“In our household, our strategy is to delay device usage as long as possible.

“Children have an inherent need to feel loved and supported, and being very present in their lives, emotionally and physically, is critical to fostering that sense of security.”

Chantelle O'Neill wants to delay her daughters Kasia, 6, and Giselle, 8 from using social media. Picture: Tony Gough

Mrs O’Neill, who has also worked for child protection at both private and public mental health hospitals, backs calls to ban phones in schools.

“Phones have no place in the classroom, where children should focus on education and in-person socialisation,” she said.

“If a parent needs to contact their child, they can always go through the school office or the teacher.

“I believe it’s crucial to create an environment where children are encouraged to engage with their surroundings, peers, and teachers without the distractions of mobile devices.

“Consistency in this messaging across schools would have huge benefits for our communities.”