With John Aloisi quitting Brisbane Roar, could Jose Mourinho take them back to the top?

They’ve lost four in the trot, sit second last on the A-League ladder and have had coach John Aloisi walk out the door — but MIKE COLMAN has an answer to their woes: the Special One.

MANCHESTER, ENGLAND - NOVEMBER 19: Jose Mourinho, Manager of Manchester United shows appreciation to the fans after the final whistle during the Premier League match between Manchester United and Arsenal at Old Trafford on November 19, 2016 in Manchester, England. (Photo by Shaun Botterill/Getty Images)

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Following John Aloisi’s departure on Friday the Brisbane Roar are looking for a new coach for the rest of the season. I have just the man: Jose Mourinho.

Don’t laugh, I’m serious.

Mourinho is the perfect candidate. He’s good, he’s available and he doesn’t need the money.

According to media speculation in the UK, Mourinho — the 2010 FIFA World Coach of the Year who was sacked by Manchester United on December 18 — will spend at least a year out of the game before taking up another managerial position at one of the world’s top clubs.

Jose Mourinho has plenty of time on his hands after being punted by Manchester United. Picture: AFP

So what’s he going to do, other than count his reported $45 million severance pay?

Having followed the career of the self-titled “Special One” for some time now, Mourinho doesn’t strike me as a man who will enjoy sitting around doing nothing for 12 months.

More to the point he won’t handle not being the centre of attention for more than an hour or two.

I reckon the prospect of coming down to Australia for the next four months or so might just tickle his fancy.

Think about it: the Roar combine with the FFA to offer him whatever they can afford (which by his standards would be a pittance), they set him and his family up in a magnificent waterfront apartment at Noosa or the Gold Coast and throw in a chauffeur-driven limo to get him to training and matches.

The Gold Coast has some beautiful beaches for Jose to enjoy.

The players get the chance to be mentored by one of the most successful managers in history, the A-League gets a massive and much needed shot of publicity and Mourinho’s every movement and utterance is plastered on all media platforms from one side of the country to the other.

It’s a win-win. Actually, make that a win-win-win because the ones who will benefit most of all will be the Australian media.

Imagine what a rising star like Stefan Mauk could learn from the Special One? Picture: AAP

Mourinho is a walking, talking headline who has never met a microphone he didn’t love — and the feeling is mutual.

Some of his quotes are legendary.

When he first arrived at Chelsea in 2004 he told reporters: “Please do not call me arrogant because what I say is true. I’m European champion. I’m not one out of the bottle, I think I’m a special one” — and for the next 18 years the British press couldn’t believe their luck.

When things were going well he was great.

“We have top players and, sorry if I’m arrogant, we have a top manager.”

“I have a problem, which is I’m getting better at everything related to my job since I started.”

“God must really think I’m a great guy.”

Ignore the sour look on his face, Mourinho loves his interactions with the press. Picture: AFP

When they weren’t, he was even better.

“At the moment, we cannot walk from the bed to the toilet without breaking a leg”

“Look, I’m a coach, I’m not Harry Potter. He is magical, but in reality there is no magic. Magic is fiction and football is real.”

Sometimes he was unfathomable.

“It’s like having a blanket that is too small for the bed. You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But the blanket is made of cashmere”

“If you want, you can make a silence very noisy.”

“The moral of the story is not to listen to those who tell you not to play the violin but stick to the tambourine”

“Sometimes you see beautiful people with no brains. Sometimes you have ugly people who are intelligent, like scientists.”

But always, he was The Special One.

“If they made a film of my life, I think they should get George Clooney to play me. He’s a fantastic actor and my wife thinks he would be ideal.”

So how about it Roar? Do yourselves, the game, the fans and, most of all, the media a favour and get on the phone.

Will never happen? Really? Well who would have believed Usain Bolt would play for the Mariners?

Okay, bad example, but you get my point.

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Originally published as With John Aloisi quitting Brisbane Roar, could Jose Mourinho take them back to the top?