Former Wanderers striker Kerem Bulut searching for a path back into the game after drugs ban

At 27, and less than a year into a long suspension from football for testing positive to a drug test, ex-Western Sydney Wanderer, Kerem Bulut, is painfully aware that his career is hanging by a thread.

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Kerem Bulut knows he is staring into the abyss.

Banned for four years for taking cocaine, the former Wanderers striker still dreams of playing for the Socceroos, of convincing people he really has grown up and “knows right from wrong”.

But if his efforts to have the ban reduced fail, Bulut sounds fearful of what the future holds. That’s why he is contemplating drastic steps to earn one last chance, even his mother’s advice to remove the tattoos on his face.

Painfully self-aware, Bulut knows he has no one else to blame for the situation he now contemplates after he admitted to taking cocaine at a party during his time with Turkish third division outfit, Menemen Belediyespor.

Kerem Bulut wants to a path back into football. (Tracey Nearmy)

“I was going through a bad stage in my life,” Bulut said. “I had a lot of problems, and I was in a dark hole. It was a one-off thing — a mistake, and I paid the price for it, the hardest possible way.

“I am trying to get a reduction so I can get my life back on track. But I have never been convicted of anything (criminal). I have always been portrayed as being this gangster, but it isn’t true.”

Bulut’s ban is at the sharp end of the severity scale. By way of comparison, Romanian star, Adrian Mutu, got a seven-month ban (for the same offence) in 2003, while the legendary Diego Maradona served a 15-month ban in 1991, also for testing positive to cocaine.

The former Wanderer says he is nothing like his public image. (Gregg Porteous)

The Australian PFA says it has received notification from FIFA regarding the ban, but is waiting for details on Bulut’s case from the Turkish FA, before it decides whether to become involved. All of which leaves Bulut in limbo — and struggling with the reality that his football career could be over.

“I want a little bit of hope, because I am really down and out at the moment,” he said.

“I am training myself, but there is only so much you can do when at the back of your mind you are thinking about a four-year ban. I can’t sleep at night. Football is the only thing I know.

“(Otherwise) to be honest, I don’t think there will be a Kerem Bulut. I just can’t see myself without football.

“I know this is my last chance. I haven’t had a lot of contact with people here in Australia — although Tim Cahill sent me messages of support.”

It’s been years since Bulut was involved with the national teams. (Mark Metcalfe/Getty Images)

While he waits, Bulut is trying hard to change people’s perceptions. He is having weekly sessions with renowned psychologist Tim Watson-Munro and retains his links with the game through involvement with a local football school in western Sydney.

He’s even prepared to make the most visible change.

“My mum said to me ‘please son, that’s enough of the face tattoos — go and get them lasered off.’ I have been thinking about it. I am sick of the bad boy image,” he said.

“I will still be the same person — but maybe for people who don’t know me, it might just change their thoughts about me.

Bulut hopes to have his ban — and perhaps his tattoos — reduced. (Tracey Nearmy)

“I am finished with drugs. It was a one-off thing, and it has destroyed my career. If I get the ban reduced to a year or fourteen months, then I could play again next season.

“I want to play in the A-League to prove my point to people here. Prove that I have changed, that it’s not just words. That I have matured into a man, and now I know right from wrong.

“I know I have the talent there, and it hurts me to watch the Socceroos because I played with a lot of those boys. We’re short on strikers, and I still think I could be that man.”