Who knew a puppy could incite so much hatred?

Being annoyed by the barking of a neighbour’s new puppy is understandable, but what this person did was completely beyond the pale, writes Vanessa Croll.

The sound of a barking dog — especially a puppy and especially if it’s in someone else’s house — drives me insane.

No, I mean angry. I feel so much anger at that stupid puppy — barking purely to ruin my day — the only thing I can think to do is lash out at the owner. Because they obviously are so neglectful, so disrespectful, they deserve to feel my wrath. A wrath only felt because of their annoying, peace-disrupting puppy.

So, my course of action is to furiously scribble a blunt and heartless letter: “Your dog’s barking. SORT IT OUT”, fill my pockets with raw eggs, storm over to their place, march right up to the front door of that house, paste the note to it, take step back and peg the eggs with infuriated force at the door.

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It’s when I see that yolk and egg white running down their door, into their shoes sitting on the porch, that I feel better. Then, and only then, can I deal with the frustration the sound of that puppy made me feel, obviously put on this planet by the person who resides behind that door to ruin my life.

Ahh … feels so much better.

When did throwing eggs at someone’s door become a rational response to barking? Picture: supplied

It’s been plaguing me, what was going through the mind of the actual person who recently did this to a neighbour of mine. So the above rant was an attempt to better understand them. Because the person who did this is also a neighbour of mine, and that frightens me somewhat.

Are they listening with boiling blood when my baby cries? Are they fuming when my dogs run out the back barking at the cat who visits our yard? Are they packing their pockets with more eggs, ready to visit my front door?

The truth about the puppy next door is, he had only been with his new family for a couple of days. He was adjusting to life without his mum and puppy siblings and learning to live with humans. His owners don’t work full time and were trying their best to crate train him as quickly as possible.

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He had barked and cried in the early hours of the first couple of days, and then again when he was left alone for three hours during the day. While the sound definitely cut through the usual humdrum of cars driving by, anger was not the feeling it induced. My first thought was to let the owners know — because they weren’t home, so were obviously unaware.

As a long-term problem barking can be a nightmare, but dogs need a few days to adjust to their new home. Picture: supplied

Instead, I found the mother trying to clean congealed egg from the front of her house while sobbing to herself.

“I wouldn’t have minded the actual letter as we need to know about the barking. But to egg my house? Who does that?”

Registered specialist in veterinary behavioural medicine Dr Kersti Seksel said it usually takes dogs two to three days to settle in to a new home. Surely this is a period of time most people can tolerate?

“It’s an emotional response to being separated from the family group,” Dr Seksel says. “With new puppies, they’ve just left their mums and their mates and are adjusting to living with people.”

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“There are many things that can be done to help them settle in. Make sure they always have plenty of food and water, they’ve had some exercise and a chance to urinate and defecate. Crate training can be really good for house training dogs.”

She said while crate training generally works well and encourages puppies to sleep when left alone, some dogs can have ongoing issues that need further attention.

20 per cent of dogs have some sort of anxiety disorder and the most common is separation distress. Picture: supplied

“Twenty per cent of dogs have some sort of anxiety disorder and the most common is separation distress. They can have panic attacks when they don’t stop barking, destroy the house or try to escape. I‘ve even seen dogs rip out their own nails due to stress.”

“The bottom line is dogs bark like people speak. It’s a form of communication. Dogs don’t bark for no reason.”

But owners generally can’t start trying to identify that reason unless they know their dog is barking when left alone.

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So, instead of letting your rage overtake your rationality, try stepping away from the egg carton and stick with a simple note to let them know. Or even better, if you’re home anyway, why not offer to puppy sit?

Because, while there are the exceptions, most dog owners, like my neighbour, are actually responsible people who care for their furry friends like they’re part of the family and would do anything to ensure they’re living their best lives.

Vanessa Croll is a RendezView writer and producer.

@VanessaCroll