Why Married at First Sight should be compulsory viewing

THIS season of Married at First Sight has proven to be surprisingly educational. The lesson? Dean is the kind of man every woman should avoid, writes Victoria Hannaford.

IT should be compulsory viewing to watch this season of Married at First Sight.

Despite the show’s retrograde premise of pairing up couples in a charade wedding to see if they can find true love, the show has proven to be unexpectedly educational, with faux alpha male Dean giving a textbook example of toxic masculinity.

The lesson? Dean is the kind of man every straight woman should avoid.

In his fiery introduction to the public, promotional clips showed Dean saying he was looking for a wife that “knows that I’m the man and that I’m in charge”.

And in tonight’s episode, the Sydneysider managed to elicit eye rolls around the nation by uttering “I’ve been a feminist my whole life.”

Dean is no feminist.

He has, however, shown his true colours. He’s a gaslighting male chauvinist, caught between spinning old school values when he feels like it, and claiming feminist standards when convenient.

Somehow he’s managed to alienate viewers of every persuasion with his offensive behaviour, whether it’s those who agree with his traditional beliefs or the more feminist ideals he claims to support.

Tracey is still trying to figure out how Dean can claim to be a feminist. (Pic: Supplied)

And if you thought he couldn’t top the escapades of cheating on his ‘wife’ Tracey with contestant Davina, think again.

If you missed it, last night’s episode saw Dean join the other male contestant’s for a “boy’s night”. It quickly degenerated into a discussion between some of the men about which of the other men’s wives they’re attracted to.

“Someone just say they want to bang Tracey, please,” Dean shouts across the room.

In tonight’s episode one of the female participants, Charlene, chooses to confront him about his behaviour at a group dinner party.

“I’m a woman and speaking on behalf of all women, I wouldn’t be comfortable if someone was offering my wife to the rest of the men at the table,” she says.

Dean thinly slices semantics, and denies it.

“You don’t trade women like commodities,” Charlene says.

Dean changes tack. It was a joke.

“We make a joke about who’s our second choice, and we’re degrading women? Is that the case?,” he mutters, while turning a Barnaby Joyce shade of beetroot. “It’s a joke … you don’t talk about men like that. How dare you talk about men like that.”

And later, after claiming to be a feminist: “To me that is sexist … to say that all the men are being disrespectful that’s just taking the cause of women and feminism and women backwards. That is just ignorant.”

Charlene is having none of Dean’s denials. (Pic: Supplied)

On and go the denials, to Tracey and all the other women in the room. He even takes potshots at some of the other men for breaking his bro code by speaking out about the night’s conversations.

It’s manipulative behaviour that many will recognise. The partner who gaslights you — or makes you doubt your own sanity — by telling you one thing while doing another.

Dean thinks, through some misguided sense of himself, that he can get away with it by using behaviour he’s been peddling all season; minimising, shifting blame, condescending looks dealt out to shut down dissenters.

Even though it’s a reality show, with all the manufactured drama that implies, at the heart of it there are real people, and real feelings involved.

It’s terrible to watch Tracey — who is meant to be celebrating her birthday — as she tries to get to the truth of what’s going on.

But there’s a timely remedy that she’s hopefully considering after the cameras stop rolling.

For Tracey, there’s still time to dump Dean before the night’s out, and start afresh in the morning.

Oh, and when she wakes up, hopefully she takes a moment to declare herself a happy International Women’s Day.