Should there be different rules for stay at home parents?

The long standing feud between stay-at-home mums and those in the workforce has been reignited when a preschool punished only non-working parents for late pick-up. Is this fair?

The long standing feud between stay-at-home parents and working parents was reignited recently when a preschool decided it would punish only non-working parents for picking children up late.

The matter was reported on Kidspot, when a letter from the unnamed preschool was posted to an online mother’s group with the question: “What would you do if you were a SAHM (stay-at-home-mum) and asked to pick your child up earlier because they didn’t have staff, or didn’t want to pay overtime to staff? Is this reasonable or discrimination?”

The letter was posted on an online mother's group. (Pic: Supplied)

It was an issue of some contention this morning on the Nine Network’s Today show Mixed Grill segment with Stellar editor and News Corp columnist Sarrah Le Marquand and journalist Phoebe Burgess.

“This could have been a really reasonable letter had it been addressed to all parents about picking their children up at an agreed time, but I think where it got a bit judgmental and harsh is when they really directed it at non-working parents, who are paying exactly the same amount for working parents to have their child in a situation which is a commercial agreement,” Burgess said.

“So if they’re paying a fee, they should be able to pick them up at a time when other working parents are as well. I think that it shouldn’t be so specific to non-working parents.”

However, mother of two Le Marquand said while she believed it was the centre’s responsibility to take care of their staffing issues, she agreed with their stance on non-working parents.

“This is a very unpopular view but I agree with what the centre has done,” she said. “I think the idea as to putting the onus on to all parents, working or otherwise as Phoebe says, that the letter addresses the fact that the staff ratios, which are very strict in childcare centres and preschools are out of synch if everyone isn’t getting picked up at a certain time.

Phoebe Burgess and Sarrah Le Marquand discussing the role of stay at home parents versus working parents on Today’s The Mixed Grill. (Pic: Channel 9)

“I think that’s actually the centre’s responsibility and they probably need to take care of their own staffing issues. But where I would disagree — and where a lot of people probably would take issue with me — is where I think it is fair enough that non-working parents do arrive earlier.

“All parents work hard in the home, everyone knows raising children is very difficult and if you’re a stay-at-home parent, you certainly don’t have an easy day. It’s not like you’re sitting around eating chocolates and watching daytime TV. It is hard work. But you are not commuting. You are not dealing with a boss. You are not dealing with the obligations that come with paid employment and you do have more flexibility to be there at four o’clock. I say that as someone that’s been on maternity leave and just dealing with children and not paid employment and it is difficult. But it is a different kind of difficult.”

She went on to say that for any parent who has experience doing both, they will understand that being a working parent is more difficult.

“It’s very fashionable to say, ‘Oh you know, the hardest job is to be at home and take care of children’, I don’t disagree with that... but non-working parents also don’t know what it’s like to do both. And if you’ve got any insight to doing both, as I have, I can tell you, just as a sheer statement of fact, it is harder to do both.”

So the question remains, should preschools and childcare facilities be allowed to make different rules for stay at home parents?