Meghan Markle should tell Pippa Middleton where to stuff her toaster
PRINCE Harry’s girlfriend, Meghan Markle, has suffered the ultimate insult: getting an evening-only invite to Pippa Middleton’s wedding, writes Kerry Parnell.
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THERE is nothing more insulting than getting an evening-only invite to a wedding.
If I were Meghan Markle, I’d tell Pippa Middleton where to toss her toaster.
Kate Middleton’s little sister has reportedly invited Prince Harry’s other half to her reception, but not wedding, taking place in Berkshire, England, next month.
The Suits star should be flattered it seems, because Pippa at first barred her completely, under a “married-partners-only” rule, which, if true, is frankly archaic.
Then it was alleged that Harry hadn’t received a plus one, because numbers were tight and he hasn’t been with Meghan for long. Again — what? He’s Prince Harry! What does he have to do to get the VIP treatment?
No, more likely, Pippa wasn’t keen on the media circus surrounding the American actress and the Prince eclipsing her special day — which will be overshadowed enough with the human headline that is her sister Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge.
Perhaps she realised it was a little mean and a lot outdated to bar people just because they don’t have a ring on their finger. I’m in complete agreement that you don’t get a plus one to bring a one-night-stand, but you shouldn’t have to make your guests undergo a relationship evaluation just to earn another chicken dinner.
Whatever the truth, Pippa has issued an invitation of sorts, allowing Meghan to attend the evening event of her wedding in May, but not the church service.
How rude! Can you imagine Meghan, all Spanxed up, marooned in her hotel room, while her boyfriend’s swigging champagne, before finally being allowed to emerge at 6pm?
I understand many people want their weddings to be intimate and don’t have large budgets — but neither of these apply to Pippa who is marrying billionaire James Matthews. She could pay for the extra place with the fluff in her pocket.
You can’t have your wedding cake and eat it — telling some people they’re not close enough to perch in a pew, but oh, they can come to the party at the end, with dodgy DJ, sweaty uncles and skiddy-kids sliding over the dance floor.
After all, the B-list wedding guest still has the same level of outlay — they have to purchase a fancy outfit, book ropey accommodation for the “charming” middle-of-nowhere location, travel for hours to get there (in Meghan’s case fly from Canada) and buy the not-quite-the-cheapest item on the gift registry.
All for a beggarly old buffet and often, a cash bar. By the time you arrive to what’s accepted as the worst part of the wedding, you’re 82 drinks behind everyone else and have to dance to Barbie Girl sober.
Etiquette experts are divided on this bridal behaviour. Zarife Hardy, director of The Australian School of Etiquette, says traditionally it is most impolite to invite a guest to only one part of the wedding, although it is more accepted now. “The number one rule is that guests never feel second best,” she says.
Pippa knows the etiquette very well — let’s not forget she’s a posh party planner by trade and wrote a (rubbish) book on it.
So come on Meghan, be my guest and give her the royal heave-ho.
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