Jackie French: This is the best way to help your kids thrive

Study after study has shown that writing stories doesn’t just teach us how to do things: it literally changes your brain, creating new neurons in the brain and connections between them, says author Jackie French.

‘Writing stories is dumb,’ the kid said, politely.

He was a nice kid, escorting me to the library to give a writing workshop.

‘Why?’ I asked.

‘Because they’re not real.’

‘Stories can be about real things. And they teach you to write about real things. Say you needed to convince someone …’

‘You mean like why you should never try to get a bent front axle fixed, but always buy a new one even though it costs more?’

That wasn’t what I’d been going to say, but fair enough.

‘Yes. You’re telling them a story: what will happen to their car if they buy a new axle or if they get the old one repaired …’

An hour and a half later he had written a one thousand word story about a mechanic, a stubborn customer and a car. And I will never try to get a bent front axle repaired.

This encounter got me thinking.

If a Fairy Godmother had offered gifts at your child’s birth, what would you ask for? Beauty? Brains? Imagination? The ability to concentrate? Resilience, so they can get through bad times? Creativity? The power to persuade? The confidence to stride out into the world?

Reading and writing stories is a perfect gift to give a child. Picture: iStock

Luckily you don’t need a Fairy Godmother. (Particularly as they’re in short supply.)

Once your kid learns that writing stories is fun, they’ll get all that and more. (Your kid is already beautiful. Everyone is to those who love them.)

Study after study has shown that writing stories doesn’t just teach us how to do things: it literally changes your brain, creating new neurons in the brain and connections between them.

Stories are how we explain the world. Politicians give us stories about how the world is, or what they’d like it to be. Doctors tell us stories about what will happen if we don’t lose 10kg and go for a daily walk.

Advertisements sell us stories. Physicists create stories that may explain the universe. Each of us creates stories about the lives we want to live and how to get there. The better we are at creating stories the more choices we’ll find in life — and we’ll learn the courage and skills to find what we want.

Stories don’t need to be written down. But writing them helps you learn, too.

But don’t say, ‘Sit down and write, kid. We need to make you more intelligent.’

Kids need to learn that writing stories is fun. It’s more fun than they’ll ever find on a screen, because when you write a story it is EXACTLY the kind of story you love. You can see a delicious pizza on a screen. When you write a story about a pizza you can taste it.

Stories don’t need to be written down. But writing them helps you learn, too. Picture: iStock

So how can you help?

— Give your kids pens, pencils, paper or laptops and TIME. Kids need time to write, and even more time to think.

— If your kids ask what to write about, get them to name the five things they love most. Writing about things that bore you means boring writing. You’re not into zombies or crocodiles? They won’t be either, soon (maybe). Meanwhile, let them have fun.

— If they are really stuck — but only then — give them a first line, then ask them to come up with a better one. ‘The volcano in the backyard just exploded’, ‘I found out my best friend was an alien when …’ It’s a game, but one they have to win, not you. When they have an idea that grabs their imagination, let them run with it.

— Forget about spelling, handwriting, or paragraphs. You have to grasp many threads to write a story and you’ll drop one if you have to worry how to spell ‘dinosaur.’ Spelling is for after the story is written.

— Tell your kids you love whatever story they write. It’s a parent’s job to love their kid’s work. Then explain footballers have to train if they want to pay for Australia, and writers have to as well. The more you do it, the better you get.

It’s never too early to start. Picture: iStock

— Once they are writing don’t help, don’t help, don’t help — unless they ask for help. A story is an incredibly delicate world and you’ll crack it if you butt in.

I didn’t like my mum trying to join my stories. My stories were more exciting, even if Mum said that someone stealing all the fish in the world and hiding them in a volcano wasn’t entirely realistic.

I relearnt that on a long plane journey when I suggested to my four-year-old grandson that we could imagine a story about his toy monkey.

He considered. ‘Okay,’ he said.

‘How about we start the story?’ I asked a couple of hours later.

He looked at me with scorn. ’I’ve already done that one, Grandma.’

And then he grinned. ‘It was an excellent story. Monkey liked it too.’

He’s learning to write stories now, learning to focus on his work, to create the heroes in his stories who do everything he wants to do. One day he may write a story that can take us to the stars, or cure a cold in half an hour, or becomes a movie that wins an Academy Award.

He may even explain why you should never, ever try to repair a bent front axle.

Jackie French is an award-winning Australian author on the judging panel of the Kids News Short Story writing competition, proudly supported by HarperCollins. Visit kidsnews.com.au for competition details.

Originally published as Jackie French: This is the best way to help your kids thrive