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Gable Tostee trial: Casual sex is not a crime

The Gable Tostee trial has drawn social censure around the willingness of a young couple to hook up on Tinder for a night of casual sex. That is not a crime.

The Gable Tostee case has drawn social censure around both Tostee’s and Warriena Wright’s willingness to use Tinder to hook up for a night of casual sex. (Pic: The Courier-Mail)
The Gable Tostee case has drawn social censure around both Tostee’s and Warriena Wright’s willingness to use Tinder to hook up for a night of casual sex. (Pic: The Courier-Mail)

Above everything else that emerged from the Gable Tostee trial in the past weeks, one fact should be ­singled out: the death of ­Warriena Wright on August 7, 2014 was a tragedy. Her friends and family have lost one of their own and the horror of ­reliving that in court is unimaginable.

But there is a pool of other information that has been grouped together in a murky mass and displayed on social media and by news ­outlets both here and in New Zealand, Wright’s home country.

She was “drunk”, he was a “playboy” and they were both using Tinder to hook up.

It was a salacious cocktail and the events of their short time together made irresistible news fodder.

The case, in which Tostee was acquitted of both murder and manslaughter after Wright fell to her death from his balcony, has attracted ­attention and drawn social censure around both parties’ willingness to meet up for a night of no strings sex.

Casual sex isn’t a crime; it happens every day. It’s not a new feature of our society, it’s just been made easier by ­technology. However, the ­inference was made, through repeatedly naming the app both Wright and Tostee used, that the pair were up to some kind of shameful activity. But their sex lives should never have been on trial in the kangaroo court of social judgment.

Would their night of casual sex have been more acceptable if the pair had met in a bar? If they had been introduced by friends? What if they had been in a “no strings” relationship?

Exactly how long would they have to had known each other before their arrangement ceased to draw comment? Despite questionable aspects of Tostee’s online history, he was engaging in a night of consensual sex, and so was Wright. Nobody could have predicted the horrific outcome of that night in 2014, but they both had a right to conduct their sex lives any way they saw fit.

There shouldn’t be a connection drawn between their sex lives and any other aspect of their lives, or even the tragic turn of events that led to Wright falling from a 14th floor balcony.

The fact they used Tinder is simply a sign of the times, not an indication that the youth of today have gone to rack and ruin.

Technology has intervened in our lives in unforeseen ways, and if people use Tinder or other apps to hook up or start relationships, so be it.

It shouldn’t be a choice subject to moral scrutiny.

A night of consensual, casual sex is simply commonplace, as old as humanity itself.

And moralising about Wright’s death is irrelevant. No night out, casual sex or not, should ever end with the loss of a young person’s life.

Rest in peace, Warriena Wright.

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Original URL: https://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/rendezview/gable-tostee-trial-casual-sex-is-not-a-crime/news-story/b7ef7595e767dc9ff1c90a6a4e70a212