Blaming victims of leaked sex tapes is abhorrent, Steve

Former rugby league legend Steve Mortimer seems to think the allure of being with an NRL player is so desirable, women are basically asking for their naked bodies to be broadcast for all to snicker at, writes Eliza Barr.

Pictured is Steve Mortimer addressing the crowd at the Canterbury NRL board Q&A held at Club Belmore in Belmore. Picture: Christian Gilles

How many times do we have to go through this?

When a woman is videoed without her consent having sex, she isn’t asking for it.

It’s not because of what she was wearing.

It’s not because of how much she had to drink.

It’s not because she was shaking it at the club.

And it’s not because she decided to date a famous footy player.

However, it seems former rugby league star Steve Mortimer has some catching up to do after he made disgraceful remarks implying women whose privacy is irrevocably violated by league players sending around their sex tapes really just wanted to be famous.

RELATED: Steve Mortimer points finger at ‘young ladies’ for sex tape scandals

“I think it can also be the young ladies that are looking for a little bit of notice,” Mortimer said on ABC News.

“‘Oh, I’m being taken out by a certain great rugby league player’ or whatever — I think that’s wrong. I think that’s wrong.”

Mortimer’s comments come after Penrith came out swinging in defence of their culture amid the NRL sex tape scandal which resulted in Tyrone May being stood down. Picture: AAP/Dan Himbrechts

How callous.

How cruel.

How utterly abhorrent.

Over rugby league’s worst off-season ever, several women have fallen victim to hideous sexual acts — rape, groping, domestic violence and revenge porn — allegedly perpetrated by players.

It is frankly disgusting that Mortimer would suggest a woman whose naked body was filmed and published online allegedly without her consent was only in the pursuit of B-list stardom.

It is equally reprehensible that the former Canterbury Bankstown player went on to describe the sex tapes as “embarrassing” — and not, I don’t know, repugnant? Detestable? Completely and utterly illegal?

Australian former rugby league halfback Steve Mortimer. Picture: News Corp

This is a prominent public figure using his platform to blame women.

This is a former rugby league legend saying the allure of being with a league player is so desirable a woman would allow her private acts and her naked body to be broadcast for all and sundry to giggle at and circulate on a Facebook page for grubs.

Please.

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You rugby league players just aren’t that great, Steve.

There’s nothing about a video of a physically powerful man slapping and stomping on a woman that makes me think he’s good boyfriend material, let alone good in bed.

There’s nothing about a video of a man calling another woman names while he brutalises her that makes me want to date him for the fame.

What a distinctly abhorrent take. Why don’t we just put that whole concept in the bin along with the idea that consent to sexual acts automatically includes degradation, public humiliation and having your privacy deliberately and irrevocably violated? Try again. https://t.co/qJFMxB5wwR

— Eliza Barr (@ElizaJBarr) March 7, 2019

It’s not sexy. It’s utterly repulsive.

All things considered, it often seems like dating a rugby league player is more of a liability than a privilege.

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And for that matter, if the players are circulating their sex tapes allegedly against their sexual partners’ will, who really wants to be famous here?

Is it the women who were publicly humiliated, or the men who wanted to look fully sick for their mates but wound up looking like a poor facsimile of Fifty Shades Of Sex Bully Christian Grey?

And even if a woman did want to be Australia’s next top WAG, what does that have to do with who gets to see her body and especially who gets to touch it?

Here’s the thing: that has nothing to do with it.

It doesn’t matter if a woman wants to be a schoolteacher or a sex worker, a writer or a WAG, a firefighter or a famous person.

RELATED OPINION: This slut shaming was a disgrace

She is not at fault when she is violated.

Media coverage last night referred to Mortimer as a legend.

Is a legend still a legend if he blames the victims of sex tapes instead of the perpetrators?

Is a man still a man if he says women contribute to such behaviour?

These aren’t poorly chosen words. This is a deeply ingrained state of mind that says women are asking for it because of who they date and how they act.

So we don’t need you to say sorry, Steve.

We need you to change your perspective.

Originally published as Blaming victims of leaked sex tapes is abhorrent, Steve