Dean Varley has days left to live: wife Kristy warns `bowel cancer is not an old man’s disease’

The wife of a man with just days to live has pleaded for anyone with symptoms to get checked and potentially save their family from the seven months of “sh.t” they have been through.

If stoicism had a face it would be Dean Varley and his wife Kristy Plunkett who have climbed more mountains of tests, treatments, grief and emotion in the past seven months than anyone should have to endure in a lifetime.

Mr Varley is undergoing palliative care at home with just days to live after a shock diagnosis of stage four bowel cancer.

He never smoked, worked as a landscaper, ate a healthy diet and rarely drank. He is just 49.

The Tumbi Umbi couple now face the tragic reality their eight-year-old daughter Louisa will grow up without her father.

Ms Plunkett agreed to share their family’s very personal story in the hope it may prompt even one person to get checked and detect bowel cancer in its early stages when the survival rate was still high.

Kristy Plunkett, her daughter Louisa, 8, and her husband Dean Varley before he was diagnosed with stage four bowel cancer. Picture: supplied

When Mr Varley accepted a redundancy in the city he decided to ditch the commute and started a landscaping and gardening business on the coast.

“He made the business out of nothing,” Ms Plunkett said.

Summer was always his busiest season, so when March rolled around last year and he started feeling a bit lethargic the couple put it down to hard, physical work.

But then COVID-19 hit and despite pairing his diet back to whole foods, lean meats and lots of vegetables he still felt “tired and fatigued”.

They arranged a telephone consult because doctors weren’t seeing patients, where he was given the advice to do what they were already doing with his diet.

“He was a 49-year-old bloke, he said `I’ll be right’ and kept doing what he was doing,” Ms Plunkett said.

By July, when he was still feeling fatigued, Ms Plunkett said he noticed a “bit of a delayed poo” when he was usually very regular but he never had any blood in his stool.

Dean Varley, 49, with his daughter Louisa, 8, at their Tumbi Umbi home where he is receiving palliative care for terminal stage four bowel cancer. Picture: Supplied

He arranged another appointment but was told he couldn’t get in for a colonoscopy until December because of COVID delays.

Getting a bit anxious Ms Plunkett called in some favours with friends in the medical industry and arranged to get a CAT scan.

“He had been mowing lawns that morning,” Ms Plunkett said.

“One and a half hours later they asked him to come (back) down.”

Ms Plunkett still recalls the moment he came home.

“He walked in the door and said `they have found shadowing on my bowel and liver’,” she said.

Further tests confirmed the worst, Mr Varley had a 20cm carcinoma in his bowel, which had spread to his liver.

He underwent surgery in October and had six weeks of recovery but when he went back the prognosis still wasn’t good.

Dean Varley, 49, with his daughter Louisa, 8, at their Tumbi Umbi home where he is receiving palliative care for terminal stage four bowel cancer. Picture: Supplied

Doctors suggested chemotherapy as a “palliative care” option that could buy him some more time but not significantly alter the result.

Ms Plunkett said they found an oncologist in North Sydney who was willing to try a radical form of chemotherapy but it just “cooked his liver”.

“It’s been one journey to another mountain to another mountain,” she said.

“He’s been in pain but he’s done it with such grace.”

The National Bowel Cancer Screening Program sends all Australians a free bowel screening test in the mail every two years.

Ms Plunkett said while it was a good initiative it sent the wrong message to anyone under 50 not to bother getting checked.

National Bowel Cancer Screening Program sends out a kit to people aged 50-74 every two years. Picture: supplied

“Even when you’re 50 you’re still thinking, it’s an old person’s disease,” she said.

“Bowel cancer is not an old man’s disease.”

Ms Plunkett said if her husband’s cancer was detected “even a year ago we would be looking at a different story” and urged anyone with symptoms to get checked.

Ms Plunkett did not agree at first when her friend Lisa Wood suggested she start a GoFundMe campaign but later conceded to “bite my pride”.

Ms Wood said the intention of the fundraiser was so Ms Plunkett could stop work and spend what precious little time they had left together.

“Dean and Kristy are much loved throughout their community and have always been the first to come to the assistance of others,” Ms Wood said.

Click here to donate to the fundraiser.