GERARD Baden-Clay was a man looking for women on the world's largest sex, dating and swingers site.
"Looking for discrete (sic) sex," Gerard Baden-Clay typed.
"Married but don’t want to be – looking for some sex on the side!"
It was New Year’s Eve, 2010, and Gerard was starting early with a resolution to escape his suburban life. The wife he no longer loved. The mistress who wanted him to herself.
A long-time married, long-time cheating husband with much-forgotten marriage vows.
Gerard was also a doting father, prominent businessman and pillar of the community. Head of his local chamber of commerce. Friend of many. He counted politicians and entrepreneurs among his inner circle.
But on adultfriendfinder.com he was Bruce Overland. A married 40-year-old Brisbane man. Non-smoker, light drinker with four years at university.
"Married but don’t want to be – looking for some sex on the side!"
It was the name he’d picked when he’d first started in the real estate industry. Bruce Overland had often emailed other real estate agents asking questions about listed properties.
He would have done well to use his background as a salesman to sell himself to the women he was seeking.
Setting up his online profile he clicked “average’’ on the box asking him to describe his "male endowment".
Gerard used the Bruce Overland persona to hide his double life. With Gerard, nothing was as it seemed.
He and his wife Allison seemed the perfect couple. The handsome, successful real estate agent and the beautiful ballet dancer. He a descendant of the war hero who famously started the Scouting movement. She a private school girl fluent in several languages. Three beautiful daughters. A house in leafy Brookfield. The Prado in the driveway.
But the car was leased. So was the house.
Their finances were a mess. The marriage was a mess.
While Gerard was trawling the internet to escape their broken marriage, Allison was desperately trying to fix it.
ALLISON'S DISAPPEARANCE: WHAT HAPPENED?
Her marriage had a beautiful facade and a rotten core. On the outside he was charming. He called her Princess or Angel. Made all the decisions. But few knew what he was really like. Like the time he laughed at her underwear. Or the time he told her she smelled. Or all the times he told her he didn't want her spending time with her friends.
He didn’t like the way she was with the children. He thought she was flaky. Inconsistent. He preferred a regimental approach.
The children needed control. Discipline. It was how he’d been raised.
He was always home by 5pm to spend time with Allison and the girls. He called it “happy hour’’. He liked the girls to see their mum and dad sitting close to each other. Appearances mattered.
But for years he barely touched her.
They were two people living separate lives under the same roof.
They’d been to a psychiatrist to talk about their relationship troubles. A marriage counsellor.
Now Allison turned to Dr Phil.
Phillip Calvin McGraw. American television personality. Celebrity psychologist. Author. His bestseller, Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy for Reconnecting With Your Partner, included a 42-question, workbook-style survey.
In December 2010, Allison opened a spiral-bound journal and began writing.
If only I had … given more sex and put some more work into our marriage and not just been a mother and forget about being a wife,’’ she wrote.
"If my relationship ends, it will be because... I didn't work hard enough."
Dr Phil had given his readers a list of 42 sentences to complete. I would give anything if my partner would … If only I had … I feel the most lonely when …
Allison’s cursive script filled the pages. A sad, self-deprecating insight into a woman who knew her husband was gone and didn’t know how to get him back.
“I wish … my husband loved me like he did before we were married," she filled in.
“I hate it when … my husband treats me like shit.
“When I get angry I … go into my cave and hide.
“I would give anything if my partner would … love me and make love to me."
She knew her marriage was a sham, that she was hiding what was really going on from others who thought their relationship perfect.
“I feel like a phony when … I am out with Gerard and his office staff,’’ she wrote.
“Friends … think we are ‘all together’. Other people think … we are the perfect married couple.’’
She blamed herself for the problems in her marriage. It was a lonely place. But for Allison, being alone would be worse than a lonely marriage.
There was more. Sometimes at night she felt lonely and cried. It hurt her when her husband wouldn’t give her a proper hug. She felt the most lonely when Gerard refused to sleep in the same bed. She was afraid of losing her marriage. Of being a single mum. Of her husband leaving. Her marriage failing. She was afraid.
“Maybe I am still harbouring regrets about getting married and did I make the right decision?’’ Allison wrote.
"Was I ready to give of myself and share or (was I) still self-centred? I didn’t want to go overseas. I wanted to change my career — to be FAMOUS! And Gerard stood in my way. And I have treated him like shit because I held this belief."
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As spring moves into summer what can locals expect tomorrow? We have the latest word from the Weather Bureau.