Louise Roberts: Critical point lost in outcry over St Luke’s virginity task

Young men are in the firing line again but it’s their school’s lesson on ranking prospective partners (with six points for virginity) that we should challenge – not the boys, writes Louise Roberts.

Young men are in the firing line again this week after they were told to choose the qualities they want in a girl for a “lasting relationship”.

The task was part of a Christian studies exercise at a northern beaches Anglican school.

The criteria ranked virginity (six points), for example, over values like ambition (three points) and being generous (one point) to reach a total of 25 points.

Ergo, you have the blueprint for your ideal partner. But it’s not that simple is it?

The outrage has been predictable and swift from fellow girl pupils and parents but then also others who exploit any opportunity to slam religion-based or private schools as elite and toxic.

I’m not defending the misguided exercise even though it was obviously dreamt up as a way to make teens think about relationships in the thankfully modern era of consent and respect, in the wake of issues like former schoolgirl Chanel Contos’s campaign.

Boys at the school ridiculed the clumsy lesson as insensitive and divisive.

But a critical point has been lost in the indignation.

The boys themselves ridiculed the insensitive, divisive nature of the assignment.

Yes there were rogue elements who articulated their unease and incredulity by dubbing the whole sorry episode a “Build a Bitch” and that is indefensible.

But they called it out.

There won’t be any praise for that, though.

Also swift was the action by co-ed St Luke’s headmaster Geoff Lancaster who apologised for the assignment in a letter to parents last Friday.

“This term the students have been looking at the complex issues of consent and toxic masculinity and contrasting the negative images portrayed in society with God’s plan for strong, healthy relationships where people respect each other as equals,” he wrote.

The Year 10 male and female students are separated for religious studies, we’re told. That’s the school’s prerogative. If you don’t like it, don’t send your kids there.

Lancaster then told the students involved on Monday that the material was inappropriate and promised a review of Christian studies lessons.

The lesson was ‘obviously dreamt up as a way to make teens think about relationships in the thankfully modern era of consent and respect’, writes Louise Roberts.

The task said being popular, a strong Christian, loyal and attractive also got six points a piece. Plus there were three points for being a good kisser and two points for being the right height.

It’s a subjective rating system which has no place in the real world and not one designed by the boys, by the way, many of whom are very conscious of being sexist or derogatory in any context.

If I had a son or daughter at that school I would be angry at that clumsy lesson too.

But it’s a sure sign as adults that we don’t always get it right.

And isn’t it good seeing our young people holding us accountable when we don’t.

As a school student, I would never have questioned something I was taught.

Teacher’s word was gospel.

Isn’t this a step forward?

It was interesting that there was nowhere near as much hysteria drilling down into what the girls were given as their task – learning about the importance of virginity and something about Satan and one night stands.

One critic said it was “disgusting – no surprise that Australia has such astounding toxic masculinity and shameful rates of violence against women”.

Yes any violence against women is shameful.

But we know not all men are toxic and the St Luke’s boys who called out this stupid assignment are proof young men are on the right path.