Let’s return to common courtesy and dial down phone volume

There is nothing ruder than talking into your speaker phone in public or having the volume up on a device with people around, argues Lisa Mayoh.

I’m not quite sure how to say this without you calling me an angry whinger who hates children – but for the sake of my sanity, and perhaps yours, I’m gonna give it a shot.

Because it seems our increasingly unhealthy mobile phone obsession has evolved into a problem that’s louder than usual. Much louder. So loud I can no longer meditate through trying to calmly ignore it.

Having a phone glued to us is one thing (one very unfortunate thing, I’m sure we can all agree, but work plus life equals this essential evil) but having said phone on speaker at full volume for all to hear is quite another.

Kids with devices blaring annoying games, horrible songs, infuriating YouTube videos – you name it, I’ve heard it and I’m sure you have too.

Maybe it’s on a plane, maybe over pancakes at the local cafe on a Sunday morning, even on the soccer sideline or, incredibly, at the park.

The loud talker on their mobile phone can annoy fellow passengers on public transport. Switching to speaker just makes it worse.

Can we all agree this is never OK?

I have three children of my own and, trust me, I do not want to hear yours. Please allow me the courtesy to clarify that I’m not saying kids shouldn’t be on screens – you do you, of course – but the world being able to hear them is the issue.

FaceTiming at home on a laptop is fine, but do people have to do it on their phone in public? Picture: Jason Edwards

Even more troubling, it’s not just unknowing kids who don’t know better unless a parent teaches them, its adults too.

There is quite literally nothing worse than a mum or dad FaceTiming their kids in public. Believe it or not, we do not want to bear witness to you kissing Johnny goodnight through the phone or telling Sally to stop crying because, yes sweetie, you’ll be home soon.

We get it. You’re away from your kids and leaving the table to have the conversation in private may eat into your kid-free dinner – but please don’t make us listen to it.

It’s almost like technology has become so infused in our day-to-day, that as a society we’ve started to accept behaviour we would have baulked at in the past. But we can’t let it go on.

If you want to listen to music in public, why not use wireless headphones?

Because, truthfully, there is nothing ruder than talking into your speaker phone in public or having the volume up on a device with people around.

I don’t want to hear the Telstra hold music while I’m ordering my morning coffee or get the new Wiggles song stuck in my head because you haven’t put headphones on your child. And I absolutely do not want to hear whether Alfie won AFL because you can’t be bothered to step outside for a minute or two. There is enough buzz and constant chatter in our 24/7 lives without the added anxiety of more noise.

So can we draw a line in the sand?

Let’s rewind to the good old days of common courtesy. Phones outside, humans inside. Mute the Muppets or lend little Lucy your airpods. And if you have to do the guilt-ridden goodnight FaceTime because you’ve left the kids with grandma for the weekend, just leave the table. Please?

I used to hate restaurants that ask you to leave your phones in cubby holes to enjoy your meal in peace – I’ve got kids, what if the babysitter needs me, I’d say. But there is a nice sentiment to their simple request. We are contactable all the time. Emails, alerts, alarms, apps. It doesn’t stop. And if that phone is constantly within arms reach, it never will.

Personally, I’m trying really hard to be less reliant on all things Apple, and it’s refreshing. I find I’m taking less photos but, funnily enough, remembering more. And I like it.

So sorry if you think I’m whinging or being judgy about kids and screens. But if you call or email to tell me why I’m wrong, I probably won’t answer. Well, for a while anyway.

Hopefully I’ll be playing with my kids or enjoying a meal with my husband, and not listening to yours.