Kerry Parnell: Latest catwalk looks that won’t cost you a cent

If you want to update your look, much of the new-season styles which have emerged during international Fashion Week is an absolute steal, Kerry Parnell writes.

Poor Fashion Week – you have to hand it to designers, they’ve got determination. If the pandemic didn’t kill off the catwalk, war and natural disasters have had a good go at making the fashion industry appear irrelevant.

Amidst all the headlines, you may be forgiven for not having noticed international Fashion Week has been on and models walking in New York, London, Milan and Paris, showcasing next season’s must-have items.

Still, there’s some good news – because should you want to update your look, much of the new-season style is an absolute steal. Here’s how you can get the look for zero sense, sorry, cents:

Borrow the BFG’s jacket: Jackets and tops were big at Louis Vuitton in Paris on Monday and when I say big, I mean absolutely giant. If you can’t access the BFG’s cast-offs, pilfer the largest person in your family’s wardrobe and wear, if you dare, their 10-times-too-big clothes. No, I don’t get it, either.

HoYeon Jung walks the runway during the Louis Vuitton 2022-2023 show in Paris. Picture: Kristy Sparow/Getty

Tie your jumpers around your waist: Also at Louis Vuitton, was the return of the sweater tied around the waist, last seen in the ’90s. This one is a cinch – quite literally – and you’d be waisting the opportunity of looking fashionable if you ignore it. Everyone has a sweater, everyone has a waist. Disclaimer: it still looks bad from the back, where the square bit flaps over your bum.

Think pink: Thanks to Valentino, this trend is easy – it’s entirely pink. The label showcased 40 neon outfits in Paris last Sunday, before briefly soothing the audience’s scorched retinas with black. Fish out anything you own in the tone and wear it all at once and you’ll be, well, in the pink. Dame Edna is punching the air at her moment finally arriving.

Add Adidas: Gucci collaborated with the sportswear brand for its show in Milan last month, sending everything from three-stripe dresses to bags and hats down its runway. For those of us not on a designer budget, we can simply pop on our gym kit and head to work with panache. Probably.

Wrap yourself in sticky tape: Kim Kardashian turned up to the Balenciaga show in Paris on Sunday wrapped in caution tape. She was making a statement to support friend, designer Demna Gvasalia, who had been a child refugee from Georgia and went to school in Ukraine. Or alternatively, you could make a donation.

Team socks with ballet shoes: Miu Miu brought back satin ballet shoes in Paris on Tuesday, so anyone who still does the odd demi plie is en pointe. If you want to give your flats a 2022 twist, Miuccia Prada teamed them with thick socks.

Grab your gumboots: Perfect for the flood-affected wardrobe, who knew you were ahead of the trend wearing your wellies and waders for the thing they were invented for. Chanel showed branded rubber boots and waders in Paris on Tuesday, signalling the return of gumboots as fashion items. But before you fish your mud-spattered pair out and galumph along to the pub, be warned, wellies in 25C mean you’ll be wetter in them than out.

Old-fashioned real-life swindlers making a comeback

They say you’ve got to fake it ’til you make it, but I get stressed out just watching TV programs about swindlers.

I’m not going to lie, because, truly, I can’t, but even watching the myriad shows about audacious con artists like The Tinder Swindler and Inventing Anna makes me anxious and I’m not the one committing the fraud.

From fake diamond tycoon Simon Leviev to fake German heiress Anna Delvey, fake festival guru Billy McFarland or even fake tech-preneur Elizabeth Holmes, my question is, how do scammers get any sleep at night for worrying they’ll get caught? I’m such a square I couldn’t so much as a blag a latte without getting in a froth about being found out.

The only time I committed a crime was when I pinched some sweets from the newsagent’s as a child … then felt so guilty, I put them back. Reader: it was my dad’s shop.

In a world where everybody’s social media feeds present at best a sanitised version of their life and at worst a fake one … it’s probably to be expected that the con artist is on the rise again. But interestingly, it’s not just faceless tech scammers, but old-fashioned real-life swindlers making a comeback.

Julia Garner as Anna Delvey in Inventing Anna. Picture: Aaron Epstein/Netflix

A few years ago, Frank Abagnale, whose life was made into the movie Catch Me If You Can with Leonardo DiCaprio, said the art of the charming con has died and made way for cybercrime. “In the old days, a conman would be good-looking, suave, well-dressed, well-spoken. Those days are gone,” he said. “It doesn’t involve charm anymore.” Tell that to the new wave of Insta Imposters.

Now you can’t turn on the TV without another account of someone living a designer lifestyle on other people’s income.

There’s Netflix’s Inventing Anna, a docu-drama by Shonda Rhimes about Anna Delvey/Sorokin who scammed her way into New York’s elite and The Tinder Swindler, about Simon Leviev who defrauded women to fund his jet-set life. Currently at liberty in his native Israel, he’s now being sued by the “King of Diamonds”, Lev Leviev, for pretending to be his son.

Also on the streaming service is Fyre: The Greatest Party That Never Happened, about Billy McFarland, who was convicted for fraud over his festival of fantasy in the Bahamas.

Then there’s the documentary The Inventor: Out For Blood In Silicon Valley on Foxtel, about Elizabeth Holmes, once dubbed the next Steve Jobs, until she was convicted for fraud.

Or how about the BBC documentary Bad Influencer: The Great Insta Con, about Australia’s Belle Gibson, the infamous wellness blogger who faked having cancer. It’s currently on ABC iview.

Thanks to the pernicious influence of social media, where photos, facts and profiles can be so easily manipulated, fake-fabulous doesn’t seem so glamorous anymore, or unusual. We’ve come a long way from Hollywood cons, like Ocean’s Eleven, Catch Me If You Can, The Wolf of Wall Street or Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.

They used to say “the camera never lies” and “seeing is believing”. But what still stands, is if something seems too good to be true, it usually is.

Even if it’s wearing Gucci.

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