Annette Sharp: A penis is a man’s greatest asset but it can be a liability
YOU never hear it said: “Oh, poor Julie. She might have been running that company/party had it not been for her rampant vagina.” Not so with men. A man’s penis is his greatest asset, Annette Sharp writes.
Opinion
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YOU never hear it said: “Oh, poor Julie. She might have been running that company/party had it not been for her rampant vagina.” Not so with men.
A man’s penis is his greatest asset. An awesome thing to be celebrated, worshipped and shared ... Just ask a man and he will sing its praises until the Murray Greys come home.
What he may fail to mention is how a penis can be a terrible liability too — how an unrestrained member can destroy decades of hard work.
Case in point, the Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce, a man at the mercy of his own rogue manhood who now finds himself clinging to the wreck of his life after blowing up his marriage, his family, his reputation and probably the careers of both he and his girlfriend Vikki Campion and all for love — or love of nookie.
Despite his high office, Joyce is merely the latest Australian titan to be accused of engaging in a sexually inappropriate workplace relationship.
Also on that list: Seven West Media CEO Tim Worner, whose extramarital affair with a company executive assistant cost him $100,000; former QBE Insurance CEO John Neal, whose affair with a company EA cost him $550,000 in 2017; former Energy Australia CEO Richard McIndoe, whose extramarital affair with a staffer was exposed during legal action brought by another staffer alleging sexual harassment (thrown out); and AFL executives Simon Lethlean and Richard Simkiss, who both resigned last year following allegations of inappropriate affairs with young women.
Add to these a roster of high-profile men and company bosses accused of sexual harassment — among them retail boss Mark McInnes, who resigned by “mutual” agreement from David Jones in 2010 after a marketing staffer accused him of sexual harassment, and a still-growing ledger of entertainment figures including Don Burke and Craig McLachlan (who denies claims) — and Joyce finds himself on shifting sands at the worst possible time.
If he thought he might find some support from estranged wife Natalie in the marital home, he was mistaken.
The candid, steely and “devastated” Natalie wasted no time in opening up, throwing more fuel on the fire engulfing her husband and his party and inadvertently adding her voice to a growing women’s movement hellbent on exposing sexist workplace behaviour.
Also lending support to this rebel cause, either consciously or not, are mum and dad investors.
They’re the voters even company boards find it impossible to ignore. When a misbehaving CEO is caught out, shareholders show their disapproval by dumping stock until the CEO is replaced.
With both Seven West and QBE, shares went into decline in the months after the CEO’s affairs were exposed — QBE’s finally lifting after seven months when it was announced Neal was leaving.
There has been no such bounce for Seven where Worner has remained at the helm. Seven’s shares hit a historic low of 48 cents on Thursday.
Meanwhile at David Jones in 2010, a sustained decline in results kicked up strongly following the departure of McInnes, who is now being talked up as a future boss for Myer.
Fact 1: Women buy shares.
Fact 2: They vote.
This second fact the National Party will be contemplating as it determines the best course
of action regarding Joyce and whether to replace him or not.
A popularity poll conducted in Joyce’s New England seat last week reflected the electorate’s lost confidence in the Deputy PM. One-third of voters polled by ReachTEL (from a survey sample of 1206) have deserted Joyce since the December by-election — his approval rating last Tuesday is down from 65 per cent to 43 per cent.
Does having a consensual relationship with a female staffer constitute an abuse of power? Yes.
Has it compromised the Australian public’s trust? Yes.
Does this voter and columnist want to see Joyce retained? No — no more than she wants to see Amber Heard and Johnny Depp’s dogs, Pistol and Boo, put down.
Would it have happened if the leader of the National Party had a vagina rather than a penis? It seems unlikely.
Middle-aged women are less preoccupied with their own virility than are men. Biology and menopause have sorted that, surely something that must be taken into account by any recruiters tasked with the job of trying to replace the existing old guard of dilapidated, spent shaggers.