Akerman: Stop taking tipsy millennials seriously – just let them all grow old disgracefully

Let’s stop taking drunken millennials, sports stars or not, seriously. Let them grow old disgracefully and, hopefully, harmlessly, writes Piers Akerman.

The cost of a night on the turps might run to $90 and a bad hangover unless you happen to hit the grog in Canberra or London.

A big Friday night out for millennials Brittany Higgins and Bruce Lehrmann on March 23, 2019, has now cost taxpayers millions in payments to Higgins, legal fees, court costs, judges and staff salaries, further inquiries, fees paid by private companies, media time and more, and the cost is still rising.

Lehrmann, who was alleged to have raped Higgins in the office of their boss, then defence minister Linda Reynolds, was subjected to two trials before the case against him was dropped by then ACT DPP Shane Drumgold. He has not been found guilty of anything.

Brittany Higgins arrives at David Malcolm Justice Centre to meet face-to-face with Linda Reynolds as part of a court-ordered mediation. Picture: Colin Murty

However, that night was weaponised by Labor and played a part in the defeat of Scott Morrison’s Coalition government. Morrison handled the matter clumsily, but not as devastatingly stupidly as Channel 10 and its then star performer Lisa Wilkinson. Reynolds is now in mediation of her defamation suit against Higgins and her boyfriend David Sharaz, which has led to Higgins returning to Perth from her new taxpayer-funded home in France and spend a night in hospital care.

The ACT government, which had employed Drumgold, the nation’s first Indigenous DPP according to the ANU College of Law, has already paid $90,000 to Reynolds in damages.

Matildas captain Sam Kerr has been charged following an incident in London in January 2023. Picture: Izhar Khan/AFP

The saga that began in the heat of the #MeToo movement deserves its own miniseries. It may have a rival in the story of Matildas captain Sam Kerr and her Barry McKenzie-like adventures in a London cab on January 30 last year. According to court documents, Kerr, who can claim some Indian heritage on her father’s side, allegedly racially abused a police officer after she celebrated a big win for Chelsea with a night on the slops ending with a technicolor yawn in the cab and had an altercation with its driver.

The hotly debated question is whether a lesbian with some claim to being racially diverse is a racist for allegedly calling a police officer a “stupid white bastard”, a charge Kerr has denied. Her lawyers say she may have said “stupid white cop” but there is apparently body-cam footage that might settle the argument.

There’s little doubt that if a white player of any gender called a person of colour a stupid “black” bastard or cop, it would have been judged as a racist slur in the wash-up of the Black Lives Matter outrage.

I blame British beer and am willing to be called as a witness for the defence. These are cases of millennials unable to handle their liquor, notwithstanding the seriousness of the alleged rape charge.

More troubling are the remarks of former Labor PM Paul Keating who, unaffected by the demon drink, issued a contradictory statement about the Australian-China relationship.

He named China as the power that ASIO boss Mike Burgess was alluding to when discussing espionage and said the Albanese government was engaged in a “so-called stabilisation process” with China while running an “anti-China strategic policy” rooted in a “mindless pro-American stance”.

Booze and young people have long been high-risk and the unfortunately addled elderly have been the butt of jokes forever. Let’s stop taking drunken millennials, sports stars or not, seriously. Let them grow old disgracefully and, hopefully, harmlessly.