Tim Blair: Labor is a big party needing a Big House
Labor senator and former NSW premier Kristina Keneally on Friday called on the ALP to move out of its Sussex St headquarters. Well, I can suggest a few locations for their new base, writes Tim Blair.
NSW
Don't miss out on the headlines from NSW. Followed categories will be added to My News.
- ICAC: Ernest Wong denies lying over fundraising dinner
- Labor boss Kaila Murnain suspended over ICAC revelations
Labor senator and former NSW premier Kristina Keneally on Friday called on the ALP to move out of its Sussex St headquarters.
“It might be time to look at changing the physical location of head office,” Keneally told Sky News. “Sometimes to change culture, you have to change environment.”
This is a brilliant idea, because everybody knows Labor’s problems are caused not by people but by bricks and glass.
Fortunately, there are a number of locations that would suit the ALP.
Long Bay Correctional Complex
Long Bay features a range of heritage features combined with all the security that a modern Labor politician could ever need.
Rich in Labor tradition following extended occupancies by various senior ALP and union identities, Long Bay is already as familiar to many Labor identities as Sussex St itself.
Goulburn Supermax
Celebrated for its cultural diversity, enchanting religious ceremonies and rich Middle Eastern flavour, Supermax would place Labor’s stars among many citizens who have the party to thank for their Australian passports.
Bathurst Correctional Centre
Labor’s recent push for rural revival would be powerfully emphasised by a bold Bathurst relocation.
Silverwater Correctional Centre
Who would want to leave? Silverwater’s ’70s style recalls an era when Labor was sometimes electorally viable, and frequent brutal showdowns between imprisoned members of rival bikie gangs may be seen as performance art tributes to Labor’s eternal interparty bloodlust.
Cockatoo Island Convict Barracks Block
Just like Labor, this historic Old Georgian Colonial dwelling needs a little care and attention to restore.
For a party of fixers, the Cockatoo Island Convict Barracks Block is the ideal fixer-upper.
Of course I am not suggesting anyone who gave evidence at ICAC should spend time at these places.