Sydney personal trainer speaks out after topless photos shared without consent

Personal trainer Lily Cook was “angry and upset” when pictures of her sunbathing topless at a Sydney beach were circulated without her consent — but was more shocked when no charges could be laid.

A Sydney personal trainer who was photographed topless at a beach without her knowledge was devastated to discover the images were circulating in a group chat without her consent — and even more shocked to learn police were limited in their powers to punish those responsible.

The issue has sparked warnings from academics and lawyers, who say the practice known as “revenge porn” extends far beyond jilted ex-partners releasing intimate pictures, and the laws have some catching up to do.

Lily Cook was left “angry, hurt and upset” after she found out topless pictures had been snapped of her and shared without her consent after a visit to an eastern suburbs beach with her sister on November 12.

Several hours after returning home, the personal trainer said she received a text from a friend asking if she had been topless at the beach, followed by what she described as a “close-up photo of me topless at the beach”.

“The person who sent me the photo confirmed who sent him the photo,” she said.

Lily Cook was photographed topless without her consent while at the beach. Picture: Sam Ruttyn

“This is when I realised a photo had been taken of me without my consent and had further been distributed.”

The photo was taken of Ms Cook as she lay on the sand, and been zoomed in to show she was topless.

Ms Cook said she reported the matter to police, but charges were not laid against the men allegedly involved in the incident.

“I’m disappointed because I trusted that something would be done,” she said.

“But now I have the power to speak out about this issue which I’ve found has happened to so many women.

“What I’m struggling with is the intent behind taking and distributing the photos.

“It’s these people thinking they now have some kind of power.”

Criminal lawyer Matt Ward. Picture: Jonathan Ng

Police warned it is “generally not an offence” to take a photograph of any person in a public place.

“There are offences relating to intimate images, but they relate to images taken in a private setting,” one senior officer said.

“Of course people should be able to express themselves however they want to, but unfortunately in this social media day and age, others get a kick out of either daring to take pictures when people are unsuspecting, or for the thrill of uploading.”

Another officer who works in the sex crimes field said: “The situation is different depending on the circumstances in each individual case. It’s a such a complex area.

“For example, if you saw an older man at a public pool taking photos of children he didn’t know, then obviously there are signs and indicators that would warrant further investigation.”

Criminal lawyer Matt Ward said in some instances, the law had fallen behind when it came to intimate images offences.

“If we look back, there was a much clearer line between what was public and what was private,” he said.

“Technology and social media have changed this dramatically. We now have people sharing all different types of content on Instagram, TikTok, BeReal and a long list of social media platforms.

“This is in a variety of ways and for different purposes, but in my view plays into how the law is trying to grapple with this issue.”

Lily Cook said she feels empowered after speaking out about her experience. Picture: Sam Ruttyn

RMIT Professor Nicola Henry, who is researching image-based sexual abuse, said: “There is a spectrum and a real diversity of motivation behind the non-consensual sharing of intimate images”.

“In our research we interviewed a woman who had undergone a gynaecological surgery in hospital and had a nurse take a photo of her genitalia, and we’ve had people whose photos have been digitally altered, or taken from social media and turned into pornographic videos.”

Prof Henry agreed the law had a way to go when it came to consent, and drew on the example of Married At First Sight contestant Domenica Calarco, whose OnlyFans photos were shared among the cast without her consent.

Domenica Calarco, with MAFS husband Jack Miller, had pics from her OnlyFans content shared around. without her consent. Picture: Supplied

“Let’s say you have an OnlyFans account and you post some intimate images of yourself. Just because you post them doesn’t mean you have given consent to have them shared or posted on another site,” Prof Henry said.

“I think we are still a little bit away from understanding consent in these image-based abuse contexts.”

Data from the Bureau of Crime Statistics showed that in the past three years, 588 charges of intentionally recording an intimate image without consent appeared before courts across the state.

Of those offences, 319 were admitted with guilty pleas, but 217 were withdrawn by police once they hit the courts.

Miss Cook has decided to speak out about her experience, as research from RMIT reveals one in three people surveyed have been the victim of image-based abuse.

The personal trainer said despite the violation of her privacy, she felt empowered to stand up and advocate for women who have had images distributed without their consent.

“This is something that needs to be talked about, there are so many women that feel like they don’t have a voice with this,” she said.

“But it’s not right. It’s 2022 and men need to realise that this type of behaviour isn’t OK.”

A NSW Police spokesman said the sharing of intimate images had been proven to have a severe impact on a person’s health and mental wellbeing.

“Images of this nature can be distributed and viewed with increasing ease and can ‘go viral’ in minutes, with long-term damaging consequences for victims,” he said.

“Even in a public setting, the privacy of others should be respected and if someone feels unsafe due to the actions of others, they should report it to the police.”

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