Principal defends school’s anti-bullying policy after student’s suicide, grieving father responds

A Sydney father has expressed his deep ‘disappointment’ with Santa Sabina College’s response to bullying after his 12-year-old daughter, Charlotte, took her own life.

• ‘Mama please share my story’: Charlotte’s final wish

A Sydney father has expressed his deep “disappointment” with Santa Sabina College’s response to bullying after his 12-year-old daughter, Charlotte, took her own life, saying students had made her life “too hard” and that she had pleaded, “please tell the school.” 

While the family has been “overwhelmed” by the support from the broader school community, they remain heartbroken by what they describe as the school’s “unnecessary” and inadequate handling of the situation.

In a heartfelt interview with 2GB’s Ben Fordham, Charlotte’s father, Mat, shared his deep frustration with the school’s response to his daughter’s tragic death.

“I think outside of the response from the broader community of the school I have to say I’ve been disappointed to say the least, with the response that’s come from the school,” he said on Monday morning.

“Some of the responses that have gone into the media, I think the first response was around that there’s inconsistencies in their records and I thought that comment to go out at that time when we were grieving was unnecessary. 

Charlotte adored her little brother Will. Picture: Supplied by family

“And since then, comments like the school’s been overwhelmed with support from other parents coming forward and saying how well they deal with these types of issues. And I’m sure they’ve had some communication and some support, Ben, but those mothers that have given that school support, no doubt they will be planning on picking their daughter up from school today, and we are not.” 

It comes afterSanta Sabina defended its handling of bullying after the suicide death of Charlotte, pointing to their Catholic values and saying their anti-bullying policy is on their website.

In a lengthy statement Principal Paulina Skerman “objected to the portrayal” of the college “as failing to deal with matters that cause distress amongst our students”.

Charlotte’s parents Mat and Kellie earlier revealed to the Sunday Telegraph that their 12-year-old daughter had left notes that asked her mum to share her story to raise awareness, named students who had made her life “too hard” and said “please tell the school”.

In the statement Ms Skerman said: “In the past week, I have been overwhelmed by the number of emails and messages from our families that talk about their children feeling safe and cared for at Santa Sabina College, and objecting to the portrayal of our College as failing to deal with matters that cause distress amongst our students”.

Charlotte was a student at Santa Sabina College in Strathfield.

She said she was limited in what could be said as she would “not breach the privacy of any student or family”.

“These matters are always complex and we always work in partnerships with families to support our students.”

Despite his deep disappointment, the grieving father expressed a willingness to engage with the school to raise awareness, saying he would “welcome the opportunity” under the right circumstances.

“It has been heartbreaking,” he said on 2GB. 

“Having said that, Ben, I would still welcome an opportunity, when the time is right, to meet with the school—if they were ever to reach out to me directly, which I haven’t had any communication from them so far.

“And if I thought it was coming from a genuine place of wanting to do better, I would happily meet with the school, of course, after the funeral this Friday.”

He also shared that his daughter’s final wish before taking her own life was for her story to be told, as he now advocates for donations to Kids Helpline.

Charlotte with her baby brother Will, brother Jake and sister Charla. Picture: Supplied by family

“We’ll never see her graduate from university, I’ll never get to walk her down the aisle, and she dreamed of having seven children—she wanted a big family of her own. I’ll never meet her grandchildren,” he said.

“I know these conversations are tough for all of us, but they’re conversations we need to have today.”

The school’s statement said the Anti-Bullying Policy is available on the school website, and was developed in consultation with the Association of Independent Schools of NSW, and further approved earlier this year by the NSW Education Standards Authority.

“Our students and our families are highly informed on the policy and the procedures for reporting and resolving matters of concern, and they clearly demonstrate the College’s approach to dealing swiftly and appropriately with any concerns raised.”

“At the very heart of who we are as a Catholic Dominican school are the Gospel values of love, compassion and inclusivity.

Charlotte’s parents have spoken out to raise awareness. Picture Supplied by her family.

Charlotte’s parents have spoken out following her suicide. Picture: Supplied by family

“To say that there is a culture of bullying at the College goes against the very fabric that holds our community together. Every staff member at the school holds the care of your child close to our hearts and this has been reflected in the number of messages I have received from our families. We continue to work with our children to educate them on reporting serious matters and developing strategies to manage the complexities that life invariably presents.”

In closing, the statement said the focus as a College was the “ongoing support and care for our students, their families and our staff, and to support Charlotte’s family through their unimaginable grief. We are continuing to work with Headspace and other providers to ensure that we follow the most supportive and safest practices for our community at this time.”