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Footy legend Rod Silva reveals his ‘horror’ childhood with an alcoholic and abusive father

EX-NRL star Rod Silva has opened up about his father­’s drinking and gambling, and the shouting, yesterday saying: “I grew up thinking these kind of arguments were normal. He admitted it scarred him and his siblings for life.

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EX-NRL star Rod Silva has revealed his drunken father’s emotional and verbal abuse had left him scarred for life — but also helped shape the man he would become.

The White Ribbon Australia­ ambassador has opened up about his father­’s drinking and gambling, and the shouting, yesterday saying: “I grew up thinking these kind of arguments were normal.

“I remember as a young child being in the room with my siblings and waiting for it to stop.

“I knew if ever I was going to get married, my wife would never have to go through that and my children would never have to go without.”

Rod Silva with wife Deb and daughter Keely, 20, at their Yowie Bay home. Picture: Jonathan Ng
Rod Silva with wife Deb and daughter Keely, 20, at their Yowie Bay home. Picture: Jonathan Ng

The former Sydney Roosters and Canterbury Bulldogs fullback, now 50, said his mother had struggled to feed her six children as her husband­, wharfie John, drank and gambled their money away before returning home to yell and scream at her.

“My brothers and sisters and myself are still scarred by what we went through,” he said. “I think it made me stronger as a man but it was tough going through it.”

The 1993 Dally M winner went on to become a police officer, regularly called out to harrowing domestic violence­ incidents.

Of his role as a White Ribbon ambassador, he said: “I don’t want people to suffer as I did and if I can help anyone, that’s what I’m about.”

Rod Silva in action for the Canterbury Bulldogs in 2000. Picture: Action Photographics
Rod Silva in action for the Canterbury Bulldogs in 2000. Picture: Action Photographics

Hundreds of sporting clubs have joined White Ribbon’s push to “not sit on the sidelines” and stop violence before­ it happens.

Married to Deb and with daughters Keely, 20, and Marlee, 22, who are both at university, Silva said many men did not realise that the whole family suffers from abuse — whether physical, verbal or financial. “A lot of men think it’s only an argument­ and everyone will forget about it but they don’t … I never forgot­ it,” he said.

Silva joined the police force where he attended many domestic violence incidents.
Silva joined the police force where he attended many domestic violence incidents.

Silva said he was in awe of how his mother Alice, now 77, not only kept the family together but studied two degrees­ and forged a career in community services.

“My mother was a very caring and nurturing woman. One of the reasons I joined the cops was because of what my mother went through,” he said, adding his parents never divorced, separating­ only after 30 years. John died in 1998.

“My mum felt isolated,” Silva said. “She thought she was better off staying and coping with it all because she had nothing and no one to help her.”

White Ribbon Australia chief executive Tracy McLeod said one in three women experience violence from someone they know, and the popularity of sport made it the perfect opportunity to raise awareness.

White Ribbon Night will be hosted nationally from 27-29 July.

Hundreds of sporting clubs in local communities are already hosting events, as are elite sports organisations.

Find your local event or register by clicking here.

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Original URL: https://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/nsw/footy-legend-rod-silva-reveals-his-horror-childhood-with-an-alcoholic-and-abusive-father/news-story/4ed2fbeeaa9673c19001bb6454bf8608