Consent campaigner Chanel Contos has her say on the porn industry

Consent campaigner Chanel Contos says you have a right to set boundaries over a partner’s use of porn.

Consent education has come a long way since Sydney’s Chanel Contos brought the danger, and alarming instance, of sexual assault to the country’s attention – but she’s the first to admit we still have a long way to go.

And the once Kambala private schoolgirl and now London based 26-year-old said porn has a lot to answer for.

“It’s not the concept of porn I have problems with, it’s the reality of the industry in practice and its relentless exploitation of many girls and women worldwide,” Contos told The Saturday Telegraph.

The Vaucluse activist is home in Sydney ahead of giving a talk on the issue at the All About Women festival at the Sydney Opera House’s, in honour of yesterday’s International Women’s Day (IWD).

“Most mainstream pornography is violent and degrading towards women, and at the same time pornography is the most common form of sex education for young people,” she said.

“I think it’s a tremendous shame that young women have been told that it’s more acceptable to consume pornography than it is to ask your partner not to.

Consent campaigner Chanel Contos. Picture: Weronika Mamot

“It’s impossible to tell if a person featuring in a porn video has consented to being there or not, which is why as a consent activist I am so disturbed with the industry.

“Regardless if they have consented, watching anything on a mainstream site like PornHub directly profits a company that has persistently aired child sexual abuse and rape … and I’m quite unfussed about counter arguments about ‘ethical porn’ because it makes up such an insignificant proportion of content on the internet and particularly that’s being sought after by boys and young men.”

The Consent Laid Bare author says no matter what you think about porn, everyone has the right to set a boundary with their partner that they don’t want them to consume pornography.

“If they can’t meet that boundary then maybe they’re not for you,” she said.

The Teach Us Consent founder and chair of the Global Institute for Women’s Leadership’s Youth Advisory Committee has recently teamed up with LifeStyles for a new ‘Let’s Talk Consent’ campaign.

“This collaboration is powerful as we are able to reach LifeStyles’ large consumer base to raise awareness about the importance of consent, and provide education about how to engage in it,” she said.

Contos says everyone has a right to set a boundary with their partner on the use of porn.

Contos is the author of the book Consent Laid Bare.

“A LifeStyles product comes into the picture at a point where consent is most critical, so being able to reinforce that messaging in real-time is pretty cool.

“The best thing we can do is expand young people’s capabilities to choose.

“Have conversations, educate, and teach them to say no.

“Most importantly, teach children how to accept no’s.

“It’s so much easier to say than to do, but continuously ask yourself ‘Do I actually want this or am I just being told I should want this?’.

“This isn’t only applicable to sexual situations, but also pressures to look a certain way, or to drink …”

It was three years ago, almost to the day, when Contos first highlighted the significance of this problem, famously posting an Instagram story asking followers if they, or someone they knew, had been sexually assaulted during their school years.

A day later she had 200 confirmations.

Soon 44,000 signatures were on a petition gaining momentum and a year later, consent education – holistic and age appropriate – was mandated across the country.

She’d started a movement.

“To be honest, it wasn’t from strength, so much as it was frustration,” she explained of the initial social media call-out.

“It was never about my own individual experience, it was about the fact that this experience is universal, as reflected by the influx of testimonies.

“I guess that’s what they mean when they say strength in numbers.”

Contos said yesterday’s IWD is a day to celebrate the success of women, and platform for important messages like hers.

“However, it’s also a day to acknowledge the disproportionate adversities that girls and women worldwide are subjected to and take steps to make it so that’s no longer the case,” she said.

“Is it enough? Definitely not. It’s a fun day, but we need to be combating gender based violence all days of the year.”

“I’m so lucky to know so many incredible women.”

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