Chris Caruana’s journey from $400k/yr NRL star to homeless drug addict — and his fight back

Chris Caruana was an unstoppable football star in the 1990s, but turned to drugs after he retired. After two attempts at suicide, he is clean and starting his life again, with a focus on helping others.

Plunged into the depths of despair as he fought to overcome a $3000-a-week ice addiction, former NRL star Chris Caruana walked into the path of a truck thundering along a busy road.

The one-time North Sydney and South Sydney glamour boy, who at the height of his career was earning $400,000 a year, sustained ­serious injuries but miraculously survived.

And it enabled the man once nicknamed “Smoke” to finally kick his ice habit and begin to turn his life around.

His drug habit became so all-compassing that Caruana once stayed awake for 12 days straight and didn’t eat for two weeks.

“I started to lie and cheat to get the product because it took complete control of me. I didn’t respect anyone, especially my family, which just isn’t me,” Caruana confessed.

In a raw and confronting interview with The Sunday Telegraph, Caruana has opened up about how things spiralled out of control — and his journey of redemption.

“If I use again, I am back in the hole. I’m sick and tired of it, I want to see light, I want to see happiness. I don’t want to be a ­victim,” he said.

Former NRL player Chris Caruana is recovering from years of drug addiction. Picture: Sam Ruttyn

Caruana was a prodigiously talented teenage footballer who had the rugby league world at his feet.

He was put on a five-year scholarship with the North Sydney Bears when he was just 14.

He went on to play 108 first grade games with the Bears between 1992 and 1997, before signing a $1.2 million three-year deal with the Rabbitohs.

Caruana was also one of the rugby league young guns, including Rooster Luke Ricketson, who appeared in the legendary Simply The Best TV ad with Tina Turner in 1993.

“You take it for granted, you think the money and the limelight is always going to be there,” he said.

“But it goes away pretty quickly.

Caruana in 1998, when he was playing for Souths.

“When I retired I was about 29-30 and I realised I had nothing behind me and I fell into very, very deep depression and anxiety,” he said.

“And I fell into narcotics, you know what I mean? A very good friend introduced me to it.”

It didn’t take long before Caruana found himself travelling rapidly down a very slippery slope.

“Between (ages) 29 to 39 I tried everything except meth amphetamine — heroin, cocaine, fentanyl, all sorts of sleep downers,” he said.

His life took a further sinister turn when an acquaintance introduced him to ice eight years ago.

“I became addicted straight away and it lasted six or seven years,” Caruana said.

“It is the most potent stimulant on the planet.”

Caruana was a painter and decorator and while on ice would work 14-15 hour days without food to help support his habit.

“I kept a diary and the longest I have been awake for is 12 days and the longest I didn’t have food was 14 days,” he said.

The drug took a dreadful toll and saw his weight plummet from 92kg to just 71kg in 12 months.

“It’s a horrific drug and I’m trying to warn young kids today not to go there,” Caruana said.

At one point, Caruana spent time living in his car and on the streets. Picture: Annika Enderborg

Due to his drug addiction Caruana lost everything, including a place to live, and for a time found himself homeless.

“I slept everywhere up and down the coast,” he said.

“I’ve been on the streets that cold and that hungry in the middle of winter.”

His possessions were a mattress, one pillow and a blanket that he would wrap up every morning, along with a backpack containing his toiletries.

“When you start to get really down and depressed you lose your hygiene and forget to clean, your dignity goes out the window,” he said.

That is in sharp contrast to the young Caruana, who once admitted in his playing days that he showered four times a day.

“I’m back now and showering twice a day,” he said with a laugh.

Caruana said he had been too proud to ask for help.

“I was taking copious amounts of narcotics to try to deal with that and it gets worse and worse and worse,” he said.

Once an NRL pin-up boy, Caruana appeared in the Tina Turner’s Simply The Best advertising campaign.

Those demons Caruana had been wrestling with for so long finally took control when he was driving to work at Ballina just before Christmas 2020.

“I had a bit of a blackout or a mini stroke and all of a sudden I’ve hit a truck at 110km/h,” he said.

Caruana said he was under the truck for 2½ hours before being flown to Lismore Base Hospital with a broken femur. The surgeon told him it was the worst break he had ever seen and that he would never walk again.

“My lungs collapsed, I broke every rib in my body and I was in hospital for six months,” he said.

After getting out, it wasn’t long before Caruana found himself in a psychiatric hospital near the Gold Coast in late 2020.

“I had just lost hope,” he admitted.

What tipped him over the edge was finding the man in the adjoining room, a heroin addict, dead with a needle still sticking in his arm.

“I thought ‘there has got to be more to life than this, I’m just not doing things right’. So I went downstairs and put myself in front of another truck on a main road,” he said.

“I broke my femur again in the same right leg, broke every rib again, broke my cheekbone and I’ve got scarring on the frontal lobe of my brain and I’ve got to be careful.

“My memory is a little bit funny these days and I’ve got to do some work on that.”

Caruana will be eternally grateful neither truck driver was physically injured.

He has unsuccessfully tried to contact both of them.

“From the depths of my heart I have wanted to apologise for what happened and I won’t do it again,” he said.

Caruana with his children Kyle and Erinn in 1999. Picture: Michael Perini

That second suicide attempt proved a pivotal moment for Caruana.

“I had a lot of epiphanies when I was in Gold Coast University Hospital. I would wake up with nightmares about what was important in life — and the most important was family and friendships,” he said.

“I had to make a decision which way I wanted to go and you’ve really only got two choices in life, I think — you can choose to be a loser and hang down with all your demons or you can take the other road and be a winner.

“I don’t give a f**k how much money people have got, I just want to look after my family and my friends.”

Mum Dawn has been a tower of strength.

“She has been my rock, she’s seen so many ups and downs in my life and I think she’s pretty happy today I’ve seen the light and that I am not going to do the untoward again,” he said.

“My family are the ones who have really dug deep and said: ‘We are not letting this bloke go’.”

His daughter Erinn and son Kyle have also stuck by him. And, in what would have been difficult conversations, he explained to them the truth about how sick he was mentally.

Now he is a grandfather to Erinn’s two daughters Tully and Sienna, which has given him another big motivation to stay on the straight and narrow.

Caruana (left) with fellow Norths players Greg Florimo, Mario Fenech and Jason Taylor in 1994.

After Caruana was admitted to Gold Coast Hospital, the third call he received was from his former North Sydney teammate Greg Florimo.

“He said: ‘It is going to be all right, we are with you, hang in there’,” Caruana said.

Calls from other Norths alumni, including Mark Soden and Josh Stuart, followed.

When he turned 50 in July last year Caruana was in rehab at Coffs Harbour.

He was given a six-hour leave pass to attend a family birthday celebration organised by his sister Bridget at the local surf club.

He got the surprise of his life when old Bears Florimo, Stuart and Michael Buettner walked into the room.

“It was just incredible they took the time to come up. There were tears of joy and happiness,” he said.

And they gave him a video with words of encouragement from 14 former Norths players.

In action against Manly in 1997.

After all he has been through, Caruana looks in much better shape and has a regained a positive attitude.

But he knows the battle is not nowhere near over.

“The next step is staying clean,” he said.

“It has been hard, there have been so many times that I have wanted to use again, a lot of triggers.”

He is receiving support as a regular member of Narcotics Anonymous, attending five meetings a week, sometimes two in one day. He is on the fourth and fifth step of his 12-step recovery, which can take three years to complete.

Caruana has replaced his former drug habit with pastimes like ocean swimming.

He will never be able to run again and still has a large plate in his femur but, when that comes out, he hopes he may be able to get back into surfing.

Christmas 2022 was the first in four years that Caruana was not in a psychiatric hospital ward or rehab facility, and it was precious spending it surrounded by his loyal family.

“I’m just grateful and humble to be alive today and give hope out there to the young kids who want to think about using narcotics and meth amphetamines,” he said.

“Every single day I wake up, I want to help just one person. If I stay clean today I can show love, support and give encouragement to other people.”

Caruana wants to use his experience to help others. Picture: Sam Ruttyn

He is waiting for a spot to begin a Certificate IV in mental health.

“That will basically allow me to work in any private and public rehabilitation and mental health institution,” he said.

“Unfortunately, I have lived through that experience, but I learnt a lot from it.

“I want people with that darkness to have that little bit of hope that there is something else out there.”

Caruana has also started doing volunteer work with Freedom Foodbank Queensland, who take donated items such as packaged food, clothing and toiletries and toys and deliver them to the homeless and most vulnerable.

And, for the first time in four years he has a proper place to live, a unit near Surfers Paradise.

“It’s incredible, I pay the rent, I’ve got the keys to it, it is my home,” he said.

North Sydney legend Florimo has always tried to reach out and give Caruana a helping hand through the tough times.

“He is a mate, we are pretty close,” former Kangaroo Florimo said.

“After footy we tried to get together but he drifted off and I kept hearing stories of him doing this, that and the other.

“Going from where he has been … it was great to see him with a bit of a sparkle in his eye again.

“Now if he has found there is something that works for him, it’s about maintaining the strength and resilience that has got him through to this point — and that can be just as hard as the battle he has faced so far.”

Big-hearted former Bears enforcer Stuart has acted above and beyond to support Caruana, and looks fondly at the personality who played with him at Norths.

“When we went up for his 50th, the amount of emotion he showed was just absurd. It was beautiful to see and we had a ball,” he said

“I think he is doing a lot better … but time will tell.”

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Beyondblue: 1300 224 636

Suicide callback: 1300 659 467