‘We need to get over ourselves’: Nikki Osborne on what we’re all doing wrong at home

House-proud Australians have replaced spontaneous visits with something much more sad, according to Nikki Osborne.

Houses in South-West Brisbane.

Is house pride destroying community?

There’s no doubt that in Australia, buying and selling property has become our national sport.

As a society, we used to all aspire to have that quaint house in the suburbs, with a back yard, Hills hoist and if you were really lucky, the swimming pool.

I remember our first house, it was a little three-bedroom bungalow (well Dad called it two bedroom plus a trophy room), with brown mottled carpets and a lime green kitchen.

It was nothing to write home about but it was a hive of visitors, parties, afternoon tea visits, play dates and cubby houses.

We had an open door policy so if anyone wanted to just “drop in”, they could. And they did.

Our friend’s houses were the same. I remember Mum and I would often drop into Marles bakery on the way home from school, grab a cake and then just land on a friend and have a merry afternoon.

It really was the dream.

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However, what started as the Australian dream has now become one of the only ways forward financially, and I believe it’s isolating us.

Our houses have become show homes and we’ve all become Mrs Bucket from Keeping Up Appearances.

We’ve all become so house proud or house paranoid that we’ve stopped saying “yes” to letting people into our homes and you can’t tell me I’m wrong. The amount of times I’ve texted someone and said, “I’m nearby shall I stop in”?

And the response is “Nah the house is a mess” is staggering. And it’s sad. I’m not entirely sure who to blame for this show home syndrome. The Block? Grand Designs? Instagram?

We’ve been inundated with images and expectations that if your house isn’t like a Three Birds renovation with a Range Rover parked in the drive then you’re either failing at life or not fit for visitation.

Nikki Osborne. Picture: Peter Wallis

It’s a disease that is running rife in the suburbs and it’s preventing us from having proper connections.

It’s like visits are seen now as “asset inspections” and we need to get over ourselves because at the end of the day, who bloody cares.

Growing up, I lived in a tiny house then moved to a massive pile on the water.

Guess where I had the best memories?

The place where I wasn’t worried about scuffing the carpet or creasing the throw cushions.

The house where the emphasis was on fun and friends.

Nowadays, I’ve made a very conscious decision that my home is for memories, not for the ’gram, and if someone wants to spontaneously spend time with me in my messy house then – provided it doesn’t clash with my afternoon nap – I’ll say yes!

Originally published as ‘We need to get over ourselves’: Nikki Osborne on what we’re all doing wrong at home