Beau Ryan on setting a bad example for his son
In an exclusive interview, Beau Ryan and his wife Kara discuss parenthood, The Amazing Race, and what really happened when Beau sent Kyle Sandilands a vulnerable text.
Stellar
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Every dad wants to teach his son the ways of the world, but Beau Ryan is learning he may need to be a little more selective in the behaviour he models for his little boy. The former league player turned television host recently spotted his three-year-old son Jesse doing something suspicious in the garden and went to investigate. “He had his pants around his ankles and was p*ssing against the cubby house,” the host of The Amazing Race Australia tells Stellar as he laughs.
“My wife came out and asked where he’d learnt that from. His bedroom overlooks the garden… so he must have seen me do it once before.”
Equal parts devoted dad and lovable rogue, Ryan is proving himself to be a publicist’s nightmare as he talks about his latest project: a new cookbook that also features his wife Kara and their children, daughter Remi, 7, and little Jesse.
Beau’s Kitchen features enviable picture-perfect images of the attractive family interspersed with their favourite recipes, including fish burgers and pulled-beef tacos, but the former Cronulla-Sutherland Sharks player and The Footy Show host is quick to knock down any misconceptions. For a start, the recipes are mostly his wife’s, although he does say he can do a mean barbecue.
Likewise, he rarely gets to enjoy the shepherd’s pie in the book because one of his kids doesn’t like it. As for the cubby house pictured in the pages? He may have told his kids he built it, but that isn’t strictly true.
“My wife does most of the heavy lifting in the kitchen so I would be lying if I said I did all the cooking, but I love doing anything with my family,” says Ryan, 35. “We also love having my footy mates and their families over to our place for regular catch-ups.”
In fact, the family of four has spent more time together than ever in recent months as Ryan’s television work has been postponed. Five years on from a widely publicised cheating scandal, Ryan has rebuilt his marriage and both he and Kara, who have been together since they were 20, say they are focused on raising their young family.
“You grow heaps as people,” he reveals. “Having kids changes everything because you learn to put other people before yourself, which I never used to do when I was younger. Now, knowing there are three people I have to provide for and protect is how I look at it. I’m sort of used to coming last now. Whether it’s food that’s left over or a chair to sit on, you’re the one who misses out. It’s just what you do.”
The couple will celebrate eight years of marriage in October and as he prepares to begin filming a curtailed version of The Amazing Race, he knows he may be in some far-flung corner of the country filming the next series when the special day comes around. “I don’t want to show my cards, but I’ll plan to have something delivered.”
Or not. Ryan says the crew is determined to film the season in the midst of international lockdowns, and cracks they’ll pull it off “even if the contestants just do four laps round my backyard”. And he admits that there is another reality-TV show he is desperate to host, telling Stellar that he has spoken often to the man who fronts Survivor. “I’ve said to Jonathan [LaPaglia] that I should come out to the island and we should have a fight to the death, and the winner gets both shows. Do you reckon that would work?”
Even if it did, the fact remains that Ryan is not very good being away from his family when he films. “The first couple of weeks is the hardest, but the whole crew is going through it so you have a pack mentality,” he says. “I realised it wasn’t too bad when one of the couples on the show went three weeks without being able to speak to their family.”
While Kara, 35, shoulders the load while he’s away, she says he’s “a very hands-on dad” when he’s home. In fact, throughout Stellar’s interview with Ryan, he’s on dad duty with his little boy which, as Kara points out, has its pros and cons. “Jesse is exactly like his father – he’s always entertaining us, so I’m sure there’s a lot more to come,” she says, sighing good-naturedly.
If it seems as if he segued effortlessly from rugby league to a media career, Ryan points out that he worked hard to learn as much as he could about the industry during his years on the field. “I like to be defined not just as a footy player,” he says. “When rugby league finished, it was like life started. I loved it so much, but when it was finished I was sort of born again.”
One of the legacies of those years is that he has a deep understanding of mental-health issues, having seen teammates and fellow players suffer. He’s an ambassador for R U OK? Day and makes a point of reaching out if he detects a mate may be struggling. It was that concern that led him to text his radio buddy Kyle Sandilands earlier this year after becoming worried about the KIIS 1065 host’s wellbeing in the wake of his controversial 60 Minutes interview.
When Sandilands later mocked Ryan’s message live on air, saying he’d used the word “bro” too often, it provoked a national debate. But Ryan – who regularly appears on Sandilands’ show – feels no animosity. “He knew it was safe to read out my message rather than someone else’s,” he reasons. “Because I can handle him putting sh*t on me. That’s what Kyle’s like. That’s who he is. I responded by sending him another message with 30 ‘bros’ in it.”
Joking aside, Ryan takes his role seriously and is dismayed by the suicide rate among young men. “A couple of friends have dealt with demons and it’s the guys you’d never pick. But it doesn’t matter if it’s someone who’s played one first-grade game or Kyle Sandilands, I’ll always reach out. Last year I saw a mate who was in a facility and he told me it was a message from one of our friends on a night he was feeling really dark that saved his life.”
Beau’s Kitchen by Beau Ryan, $29.99 (Bauer Books), is out now.