Edwina Bartholomew: As mums we all need to stop fighting and picking on each other

When it comes to other people’s kids, I don’t give two hoots. But mums, let’s try to be on the same side, argues Edwina Bartholomew.

Edwina Bartholomew says women should just do what works for them and stop being judgmental of others. Picture: Tim Hunter

They are making a sequel to Mean Girls, it’s called Mean Women, it’s a little less violent than Single White Female and not quite as wholesome as Little Women.

Instead of a girl’s high school, it takes place at the primary school gate and on Facebook. To be a member of the cast you must be judgmental, quick to enrage and interested in other people’s business, which seems like the whole world nowadays.

Let’s start with the lunacy surrounding a lunch box, a lunch made by a woman for a man. Well, rip off your bra and burn it, I say, what a betrayal of the women’s movement.

Kiara Wood-Lowe posted a TikTok video of her partner’s lunch and there was instant outrage. “He needs to make it himself, he is a grown man,” one woman said.

“Do his workmates tease him?” another said.

It was simply baloney, pun intended. Her partner. Her choice. Her life.

In our house, my husband does the groceries. I do the cooking. He does the cleaning. I do the washing. It works for us.

Then there was the Canberra mum who tried to make a joke about what to wear to school pick-up this week. Lauren Dubois has a large Instagram following and her stories are tongue in cheek. Disclosure — she’s also a friend.

Actor Lindsay Lohan with Amanda Seyfried, Rachel McAdams and Lacey Chabert in a scene from film Mean Girls.

Lauren made suggestions on casual but presentable outfits, enough to show you put a small amount of effort in but comfortable enough to spend the whole day in.

She acknowledged some couldn’t give a rat’s a**e about what they wear to the school gate, and that’s totally okay. Well, didn’t that throw the cat among the mother pigeons.

The vitriol online was instant and fierce. Lauren was slammed, screen shots of her children were shared on various news websites and she was trolled relentlessly by other mums.

She dealt with it with humour and grace but it points to a growing trend online of loving to hate.

We are happy to share a ‘You be You and I’ll be me’ meme but how many of us are actually living that mantra?

One of the comments read, “Who gives a f**k what you wear to school drop-off?”.

That is fair enough but what if you do? I think that is fine too.

If you are expecting more judgmental condemnation here, you have come to the wrong writer. When it comes to other people’s children and choices, I don’t give two hoots.

In the end, just do what works for you. We are all in the trenches. Let’s try to fight for the same side.