Single people prefer dating apps than meeting in person as they ‘fear’ rejection and confrontation
Experts say old-fashioned romance and spontaneity, from opening of a car door and wooing a potential loved one with flowers is dying with mobile dating in the digital age. DO YOU AGREE? VOTE IN OUR POLL.
Flirting was once seen as a playful way to arouse interest in the opposite sex.
A coquettish glance, a fluttering eyelash, a tinkling laugh by women could spice up a date. For men, it was chivalry and compliments.
Nowadays, not so much.
Old-fashioned romance and spontaneity, from opening of a car door and wooing a potential loved one with flowers, to the simple thrill of meeting a potential lover for the first time, is dying with mobile dating in the digital age, love experts say.
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School of Attraction’s Damien Diecke said too many people had their heads down using dating apps in bars instead of embracing face-to-face interaction.
“People will text ‘here’ when picking up a date for the first time rather than walking up to the door and knocking,” he said.
“There’s also been a dramatic increase of flaky behaviour with people more likely to abandon a date at the last minute.”
Experts say swiping left or right on popular dating apps Tinder or Bumble results in shorter dates because users think that will boost the chances of success.
Gifts or flowers are also being scrapped for fear of appearing to come on too strong.
With Tinder boasting more than 50 million users worldwide and at least four million Australians using the service to find a partner, fewer singletons are trying their luck in pubs and clubs in fear of real life rejection.
“They are avoiding confrontation, or rejection. Young people are not as resilient as they used to be 20 or 30 years ago,” said etiquette expert Jodie Bache-McLean.
“In my era, a bloke would come over and offer to buy you a drink or talk. It is quite bizarre that someone would rather swipe through their phone than walk over and say hello.”
But there are benefits of modern dating. Suitors can check out the photos, hobbies and even professional histories of dates before meeting.
“Even 10 years ago you couldn’t really do any research on someone before you meet them for a date, if it was set-up,” she said.
“Now you can look through pictures, videos even their professional history.”
But online dating is here to stay says Olga Khabuktanova who met her partner overseas but has many friends who met online.
“I think it feels a lot safer for people because if you talk to someone and you don’t like them you can just block them … disconnect.”