The one thing I ask of anyone driving my kids around

"My baby was five-months-old when a drug driver crashed into us, so this is a non-negotiable."

Maybe I have been naive, but I thought it was a given to keep kids in safer car seats for as long as possible. This doesn’t seem to be the case for many families. 

My daughter is nearly six years old. I am just now realizing a lot of kids her age are already using booster seats with just a seatbelt - some have even ridden without a car seat at all.  

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A generational difference?

Of course this has meant my daughter has started asking to change her carseat into a booster seat like her friends. To which I am explaining to her that her car seat is much safer.

There is no sugar coating it - a five point car seat is so much safer. 

“But Muuuuum, my cousins have booster seats,” she protests. “Charlie from school said he doesn’t even have a car seat.”

I don’t care kiddo. 

Since this question has started coming up in our household, I’ve re-looked into the ‘technical legal requirements’.

In Australia from age 4 - 7 children can be in a forward-facing car seat with a built-in harness or booster seat. Children 7 and older can be in a booster seat or even an adult lap-sash seat belt only.

But is it the safest option?

The Royal Children’s Hospital have the expert recommendation to keep children in a “Forward-facing car seat with inbuilt harness for as long as possible.” Children older than seven are legally allowed to be without a car seat but RCH say not to judge based on age, but size of the child. 

So we have chosen the safest option - keeping them in an inbuilt harness car seat for as long as possible. But not everyone in our circles agrees this is the right thing to do.

Image: Supplied

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"Just sit in the back seat"

My parents have offered to take our kids in their car and suggest that they could use booster seats, or even ‘just sit in the back seat as it’s only around the corner’. 

We have not allowed this. 

This is a generational difference. Years ago car seats weren’t even a thing. Babies were carried home from the hospital in the arms of their mum. Kids were squished in cars fitting as many as they could across the back seat. 

And I know my parents mean well, they are completely loving grandparents. It is purely our opinion as parents now to not risk it. My parents now understand our opinion on this. 

So each time our children go in another person’s car - I pull out my mummy muscles, climb into the boot, unplug the harnesses, unclick the ISO fix, and transfer the car seats over carefully and correctly. 

Every single time.  

"A quality car seat was our first investment -  thank god"

We even take our car seats with us as luggage on planes when we fly to ensure they will have a safe seat while we are on holiday. It’s free to do with most airlines and doesn’t take that much effort. 

It's a little bit of work for a lot of safety. Perhaps other people will think this is over the top - but I couldn’t care less. 

Years before I had children I used to be a Nanny and I remember the oldest boy was 10 years old and only he was allowed in a booster seat. The younger two kids, 6 and 4, were in proper car seats.

Initially I was surprised to see a 10 year old still sitting in a booster seat, but soon came to appreciate the importance of safety over anything else when it comes to driving kids in cars. 

I knew I wanted kids and decided that when my time came I would invest in extremely sturdy car seats that would last. A quality car seat was the first investment we made -  and thank god we did. 

When my daughter was five months old we were in a car crash where a drug driver crashed into us. This was completely out of our control - and so it doesn’t matter how much of a ‘good driver’ anyones thinks they are - kids need to be in sturdy car seats. 

It’s not about how careful you are on the road, it's about being aware that anything is possible and we simply can’t trust other drivers.

Thankfully after our crash we were unharmed and the driver who caused the crash was caught a few days later. (They initially got away at the scene.)

Our car was wrecked but insurance covered it and also covered a completely brand new car seat. Although it looked completely fine, the insurance company stated that if there was ANY risk of internal damage to a car seat it is not worth the risk of using it. 

Perhaps I have some car seat anxiety due to this car crash - or maybe some people might say I am being over-protective. One thing I know for sure - I will not be taking my kids out of a five point seat belt harness until they are at least eight years old. 

Originally published as The one thing I ask of anyone driving my kids around