Nicole O’Neil, Real Housewives of Sydney star opens up on life and family, with a message to online trolls
Say what you will about Real Housewives of Sydney star Nicole O’Neil - she knows who she is and is proud of it. But to the trolls, her message is clear - leave her children out of it.
Entertainment
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If you think you know Nicole Gazal O’Neil, think again. Because the woman who jumped at the chance to do a second season of The Real Housewives of Sydney did so because she was ready to challenge herself and launch Nicole – version 2.0.
“I’m in a different stage in my life,” the mother of two tells Insider this week – multi-tasking while on a Costco run – ‘because we don’t have a choice but to multi-task, do we?’.
“My eldest has finished school and she’s at university and my youngest is about to take the HSC – so I’m looking forward to Nicole 2.0 and the next the next chapter, which is really exciting.”
It’s been six years since the local Real Housewives franchise burst onto our screens in a blur of Birkins and big personalities. This time, O’Neil joins fellow mum Krissy Marsh as the show’s alma mater, with new recruits including Sally Obermeder, Terry Biviano, Bondi vet Kate Adams, Prague-born Caroline Gaultier and mum of two Victoria Montano.
For former Miss Australia O’Neil, life with her hedge fund manager husband and two daughters – both national fencers – is a busy one. And while most wouldn’t describe the privilege of Sydney’s eastern suburbs as relatable, O’Neil says she’s just that.
“I feel like I am relatable – I’m a mum, I cried because my daughter’s gone off … to me it’s very important that message comes across,” she explains.
“I’m a mum and I’ve got two kids and I’m going through the next phase of my life, which is just heartbreaking,” she laughs.
She says season one was ‘a lot of fun to film’ and everything was new and shiny – an incredible experience, with no regrets – so getting the chance to be in the Binge show’s next chapter was a no-brainer.
“And despite what the final edit (of season one) was, the process was very different,” she says.
“And so it’s funny, because when we watched it back, it didn’t feel as bad as what it was portrayed to be in terms of the fighting and the arguments so the experience was great.
“So when I was asked to come back to do season two, I jumped at that experience, because I had a really good time – it’s a great opportunity to meet some new girls, have some new adventures and try new things.
“Naturally, seven girls together in a very intense filming period, you’re going to see the ups and downs of relationships, because that’s just what the nature of the show is – there’s definitely a lot of colour – but I feel like the producers gave all of us a chance to really tell our story.
“I feel like the viewers will be invested in each of us personally, and I think that’s really important that we didn’t get in season one … and I haven’t seen any of this season but I’m hoping that at who we are comes across a lot more.
“And relationships – like five of us were really good friends going into it – Krissy and I Victoria, Terry, Sally – we were natural group of friends, whereas in season one, it didn’t fit so well.
“I wouldn’t go for lunch with some of those girls in season one, just because they just we just didn’t mix in those circles, so it felt forced – whereas this time it didn’t.
“It felt very natural.”
When it comes to her girls, O’Neil is ‘bursting with pride’. Neve just graduated from Kambala as deputy head girl and leaves as the only student to ever have done four unit maths and four unit English. And while O’Neil’s job as a stay-at-home mum meant being the best one she could – she knows it’s now time to prepare them for the world, and let them go.
“My other daughter (Nawal), God love her, went off to America by herself with my mum and sister but without me because I had to stay here because Neve’s doing the HSC,” she says.
“Mum’s got her set up and everything, so she’s doing University over there and she’s managing life … it’s funny because I’m like a real helicopter mum, Tiger mum, whatever you want to call me.
“So to let one go out of the nest was … bittersweet.
“I feel like I’ve given them that grounding, but at the same time, it’s time to let them go.”
Most of the time she’s fine with that – but sometimes, when she’s sent pictures of clothing care labels and asked how to clean something, she thinks ‘how is this child going to survive in the world?’, she laughs.
“A lot of my storyline in season two is about me getting Nawal ready for the world – and it’s so funny because as a parent, there’s so much my daughters are capable of doing and can do – four unit maths and a civil engineering degree and she’s amazing at doing all these things.
“But I’m there, teaching her how to sew on a button, how to make pasta, how to wash, taking self defence classes – I’m like, you need you need some basic training, my friend.
“But I’m not done yet – as my as my grandmother used to say, you can’t judge anyone’s children until they’re 65 – I got into bed with Neve last night and she looked at me and was like ‘what are you doing?’ and I was like ‘I just want to smell you and just squeeze you’,” she laughs.
Her girls were too young to watch the first season of the show, and she admits she wouldn’t have signed up again without their approval. Her ‘helicopter’ parenting meant they weren’t allowed on social media until they were 17 and she still tracks them – a safety net that came about so she could stop replacing lost blazers or sports bags left on buses.
“I would never have done this show had my girls not agreed,” she says.
“They’ve never seen season one, and both of them featured on the show, but in a very edited and measured way.
“And they know me.
“They know their mum – they know who I am and I can’t tell my children in life to go and take chances, unless I do – and I live by my words.
“And yes, it’s a risk because you never know how you’re going to be edited.
“But if you behave in a certain way, your true character will always come out.”
She also knows there will be haters – but has a message for the inevitable trolls.
“People are going to call me names and people are going to have their judgments and that’s fine – my only thing is for the trolls to stay away from my kids,” she says.
“You want to troll me on social media or have negative things to say about me, say it to me, not my kids – and I hope that we can keep it that way.”
While her mum and hedge fund husband were ‘camera shy’ and won’t be on screen, she says that’s their decision and one she respects – because doing the show was her call.
“To go and do a show like this, you’ve got to be very confident in who you are and what your beliefs are – it’s crucial,” she says.
“You cannot go in with secrets and you can’t go in caring what people think because everybody’s going to have an opinion about who you are and what you’re doing and you’re going to be judged.
“Everyone has a different version of doing their best and what they think is right, and to go on to a show like this, you’re exposing yourself – so you’ve got to believe that your way is the best way for you.”
Taking more time for herself now after all these years, O’Neil is about to launch a business selling transdermal vitamin patches that absorb vitamins straight into your system.
“I’ve always been a business woman, I’ve always been an entrepreneur, I’ve always wanted to do something – and that went on the backfoot,” she says.
“I was married at 24, I was a mum at 25 and I did run my events company on the side when
I had the girls but I was a full time mum, and I took that on.
“I was head of the parents association at the school and I was heavily involved with the girls and their fencing and everything like that – so I’ve always had a plan for the Nichole 2.0, whether it was housewives or not housewives, I was going to do something.
“So after two years of trying to find the right thing, I’m really excited to be looking forward to being the business woman that I always dreamt I would be, for the next chapter of my life.”
She says wellbeing has always been important to her, and with a Swedish mum and Lebanese dad, home remedies shaped her upbringing.
“My mum always turned to natural remedies that my grandmother – who was my best friend growing up … I remember vividly as a child, she would peel potatoes and soak them in water every night before she went to bed and then drink the water the next day because it was alkaline water,” she says.
“She was always on the forefront of what was new and happening and eating certain foods and berries and herbs and saffron and turmeric – so I was fascinated by all of that.
“I think that mix of cultures of how we grew up, and my upbringing really had an effect on every facet of my life – whether it was traditions or Christmases and New Years to literally when we were sick to how we were cured.
“So exploring eating healthy and living well has always been part of my life.”
Privacy is still important – but so is giving of yourself. And teaching her kids the importance of hard work is a priority.
“As I say with my children – yes, we’re lucky to have been brought up with privilege, but my kids still have to put their head down and study and my girls work really hard. “They’ve missed school formals, socialising with their friends because of their fencing, and that can be said for any high level sport or anything that anyone puts a commitment to.
“They might have been given opportunities, but they have worked damn hard for everything they’ve achieved – and that’s nothing to do with privilege – it’s to do with working hard, and my girls have earned it.
“No one can take that four unit maths exam except yourself.”
The Real Housewives of Sydney premieres on October 10 on BINGE, with new episodes every Tuesday.
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