Vampire Academy: Leigh Paatsch movie review

VAMPIRE Academy might have been better off being adapted for longform TV, rather than the big screen.

VAMPIRE ACADEMY

Rating: 2 stars

Director: Mark Waters (Mean Girls)

Starring: Zoey Deutch, Lucy Fry, Danila Kozlovsky

"A school where every subject sucks"

RICHELLE Mead's sharp series of young-adult novels might have been better off being adapted for longform TV, rather than the big-screen blunting they cop here.

Director Mark Waters (Mean Girls) has so much backstory and on-the-spot exposition to work through that his movie finds itself finishing up just as it is getting started.

The principal setting is St Vladimir's, a Hogwarts-like boarding school for bloodsuckers often frequented (though not always legitimately) by members of three vampiric tribes.

There's the peace-loving Moroi, who won't kill you if they drink your blood; the Strigoi, who most certainly will kill you; and the half-human hybrids known as Dhampirs, who kind of make it up as they go along.

Got all that? Now feed it into a typical American high-school black comedy. Any gap where there should be bouts of bitchy backbiting is filled by bouts of bitchy neck-biting.

An eager young cast of no-names gives the film more energy than it is willing to transfer to viewers. Worth a look only if you're a tragic fan of the books.