Five Aussie TV props that deserve a Logie

FROM the Summer Bay diner hamburger phone to Bert Newton’s hairpiece ... these are Aussie TVs most famous props that deserve a Logie award.

THE Logies is Australian TV’s night of nights, where the best actors and shows are rewarded for their hard work.

But the awards are also a sham. Why?

Because once again, the organisers have overlooked a category that is just as deserving of recognition as any male or female personality.

The props.

They’re the forgotten heroes on the small screen who bring a character or a set to life, and it’s high time they were recognised with their own piece of silverware.

So here at news.com.au we’ve compiled this list of our favourite Aussie TV props of all time, who we’re willing to pay homage to even if the Logies are not.

The Summer Bay diner phone:

It may look cheesy, but this phone definitely deserves a Logie.

It’s perhaps the most famous Aussie TV prop ever. The hamburger phone in Summer Bay’s diner is the prop with the lot. It even withstood the earthquake that destroyed the original diner. For years it’s sat proudly in the Summer Bay eatery, ringing to inform the staff that Alf is on his way in and wants a cheeseburger waiting, or that Donald Fisher wanted to book a private table so that he can romance Marilyn, or even informing people of bad news such as Shane Parrish’s death of septicaemia (too soon? It always will be).

It’s about time the hamburger phone was given a big pattie on the back and rewarded for its loyal service to Summer Bay. By the way, ever wondered how Alf likes his burgers? FLAMIN’.

Harold’s tuba:

Blow that big thing Bishop.

Sunday mornings in Ramsay Street are traditionally quiet — until that is a low, somewhat offensive sound pierces each house’s walls and wakes up the occupants lying inside. It could only be one of two things — either Toadie’s bowel movements after a big night out or Harold’s tuba. The tuba is Harold Bishop’s trustworthy companion. It’s done what Madge has failed to do, it’s survived. Whether it be entertaining passers by as part of the Salvation Army band or just letting an old man blow off some steam, the tuba is an icon of Australian TV. As the theme song says, With a little understanding you can find the perfect blend. Take a hint, Logie organisers.

Red Faces gong:

“Gong him Red!”

It’s the piece of metal that ended the short-lived showbiz careers of thousands of Australians — and not a moment too soon. Manned by a stone-faced Red Symons, the gong was basically a life saver, putting us, the audience, out of our misery as we watched countless untalented hacks act like buffoons on Hey Hey It’s Saturday. The show won 11 Logies during its 29-year run. The gong won 11 less. It’s about time the award show organisers plucka-ducked the courage to recognise the gong’s long and outstanding service to Australian television.

Biggest Loser scales:

What goes from 0-100 in one second flat? The Biggest Loser scales.

For nine seasons, this poor piece of metal has somehow managed to retain its shape as overweight Aussies walk all over it. We can’t imagine the horror this prop has been through. It’s about time these scales were rewarded with a Logie … it’s weighted long enough.

Bert Newton’s hairpiece:

It’s like seeing Molly Meldrum without his cowboy hat isn’t it?

A wise man may or may not have said, “A man who can fool people with his hairpiece is no fool at all.” Bert Newton is certainly no fool. His glorious tuft of fake hair has sat proudly on his head for decades as he’s gone about entertaining millions of people on various shows. Whether he was manning the Family Feud buzzers or throwing to an infomercial about the latest ab crunching machine on Good Morning Australia, Bert’s hairpiece was there for the ride and added to the TV legend’s gravitas. While the man himself has won four gold Logies, his hardworking hair piece has never been rewarded. Travesty.

TV Week Logie Awards, Channel 9, Sunday, 7.30pm

Which prop do you think is most deserving of a Logie? Let us know in the comments below.