TO CANADA AND BEYOND
It’s an election tradition older than kissing babies or – in Hillary Clinton’s case – dementedly pointing at someone and acting startled.
It’s an election tradition older than kissing babies or – in Hillary Clinton’s case – dementedly pointing at someone and acting startled.
Every four years, America’s stupidest celebrities announce they will leave the US if their preferred candidate doesn’t win. This was an especially popular vow during George W. Bush’s two election campaigns.
These dopey celebs generally nominate Canada as their future home. Then they stay exactly where they are. None of them even call any real estate agents in Manitoba or Saskatchewan.
This time around, however, politically-jittery show business types are looking at regions far beyond the Great White North. Some are even claiming they’ll move to Australia rather than endure a Donald Trump presidency.
During an interview in August with Australia’s 60 Minutes, elderly singer and devoted Democrat Barbra Streisand pledged: “I’m either coming to your country, if you’ll let me in, or Canada.”
Try Canada first. Please. Actress Ali Wentworth, who once played Jerry’s girlfriend on Seinfeld, also has Australia on her mind. “If Trump wins, we’ll start looking at real estate in Sydney, Australia. No crime, no guns,” the wife of former Bill Clinton circus midget George Stephanopoulos said.
No crime in Sydney? No guns? Ali doesn’t read much.
Someone called Raven-Symoné – an actress, according to the internet – went with convention. “My confession for this election is if any Republican gets nominated, I’m gonna move to Canada with my entire family,” she told TV viewers. “Is that bad?”
Only if you’re unaware that at least one Republican is usually nominated to run for president. Just as well Samuel L. Jackson isn’t coming to Australia, because he’d immediately be up on 18C charges. “If that motherf—ker becomes president, I’m moving my black ass to South Africa,” the actor declared, racistly.
(Continue reading To Canada and Beyond.)
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