Abbott must wait for PUP to chew itself to pieces

GIVEN the choice between watching a circus or grappling with substance, the public will opt for the clowns every time. That was a bit of a plus for the publicity-seeking Clive Palmer and his PUPpies when they made their first appearance in the senate and it was a small bonus for Labor, though not necessarily the Greens. In dealing with Palmer and the PUPs, the Abbott government faces the classic dilemma anyone who has ever dealt with an absolute lunatic must consider. Do you pretend that the idiot is sane and try to negotiate as if the fool was ­rational, or should you ­approach them as you would an unbalanced and irrational gibberer and attempt to show them why their confused ill-ogic cannot provide a solution? Contrary to Palmer’s assertion, the Abbott government didn’t doublecross the PUP. The Abbott government accepted a PUP amendment on Wednesday night but the PUPs had changed it by Thursday morning and would change it again before attempting to put it before the senate. It was the PUP, not the government who attempted to present an unconstitutional amendment, and it was the PUP, not the government, who made the unreasonable demand for total carbon tax ­compensation. How, for example, can consumers be fully compensated for all carbon tax costs when it is patently clear to all but populist oafs that the cost of the carbon tax levied on such items as the refrigerants used in abattoirs and cool stores and in supermarkets cannot reasonably be calculated and ­returned to customers. The PUP wasn’t doublecrossed, they doublecrossed themselves. Or, in language that Jacqui Lambie might understand, they piddled on their own swag time and again. That was last week’s circus performance. This week’s is still being scripted and it is to be hoped that the PUPs are walked through the most basic steps of parliamentary process and given a course in kindergarten constitutional law ­before they return to Canberra. The substance of the situation is that from July 1, the balance of power in the senate shifted from the ALP-Green centre-Left axis to the PUP and other crossbenchers, a centre-Right axis. The Abbott government has shown it is prepared to ­attempt to negotiate with the PUP, and others, such as independent senator Nick Xenophon, when necessary. It has not, as Labor and Greens insinuate, capitulated to the PUP. If anything, it is settling down to play a long game and give the PUP plenty of time to selfdestruct. Palmer’s populist image has so far been built on advertising, and court papers indicate that his Chinese business colleagues may have unwittingly underwritten his campaign publicity costs. His attempts to portray himself as something of a homespun philosopher are rapidly foundering as he has been unable to present anything resembling consistency of policy. Past performance in Queensland, Western Australia and Tasmania would indicate he hopes his blustering populist buffoonery would distract his followers from examining his lack of realistic policy goals and sufficiently confuse them into thinking he can ­deliver something meaningful despite a total lack of evidence. If he hopes to force the government’s hand with his stunts and push it into calling a double dissolution, he may be whistling in the dark. It is ­apparent that the Abbott government is not going to rush to a double dissolution election and would probably only consider employing such a tactic towards the end of its term. While Palmer has captivated the media, Labor has been let off the hook. Last year, Labor boasted that it had dumped the carbon tax. It had not, no more than it had ­returned the budget to surplus. It went into the election with a firm promise to enact legislation repealing the carbon tax. It has not voted against doing so. As the government leader in the senate, Senator Abetz has pointed out, every senator, other than the 10 Greens, was elected on abolishing the carbon tax. “So it is a bit frustrating when you look around the chamber at 76 senators and see only 10 senators that were committed to the carbon tax yet we can’t get the numbers together to repeal it,” he said. The unfortunate Senator Lambie, still smarting from the fact that she did not receive a single vote when she sought preselection as Liberal Party candidate, has demanded Prime Minister Tony Abbott sack Senator Abetz “immediately” for what have, in fact, been the PUPpies’ blunders. “If you want to come into the kennel with the PUPs, be prepared to be chewed up and spat back out. Stop these silly games,” she shrilled during an interview on Friday. The senator needs reminding of the old adage that those who lie down with dogs do run the risk of picking up fleas.