Lovell family opens up about living in the house where Emma died
The daughter of Emma Lovell, who was stabbed to death during an horrific home invasion, has spoken for the first time, revealing how she keeps her mother’s memory alive.
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Home is no longer a sanctuary for Lee Lovell. It’s the scene of an unfathomable tragedy that changed his life and that of his two young daughters forever. It’s the place his beloved wife Emma took her last breath.
But the humble North Lakes property also houses the family’s most cherished memories together – which is why they say they don’t want to leave
Emma Lovell, 41, was stabbed to death on Boxing Day last year. She was the victim of a home invasion amid a spate of crimes sweeping Queensland.
Eight months on, it doesn’t get easier for the family.
“What happened outside (this house) was just horrific but at times I try not to focus on that,” Mr Lovell said.
“I just want to focus on this house being a happy place for us and our family.”
The hallways of the Lovell household are adorned with photos of Ms Lovell and her kids Scarlett, 15, and Kassie, 14. There are pictures snapped at the beach, a place the family would often go together.
Speaking for the first time since her mother’s death, their daughter Scarlett said seeing photos helped her keep her mother’s memory alive. One of her favourites she likes to reflect on is their late night drives to pick up her sister.
“I guess it’s when we really opened up to each other but also had a lot of fun singing songs and stuff,” Scarlett said.
“But (I) also (miss) her and generally having her presence around she’s always like brightening the mood.
“She was always really happy. It was really rare I’d see her sad.”
Since the incident, Mr Lovell has added extra security. The house is now extra protected with a security door at the front, motion sensors and cameras. But he still finds it difficult to sleep.
“During the night you hear a noise or sound or something and I’m always like reaching for my phone and checking the cameras,” he said.
“So that’s really hard to deal with.
“I do feel safe but I can’t get over that thought of people being in our house again.
“You try to think logically when you do wake up that the chances are there’s not going to be anyone out there, but it’s hard.”
It was just weeks ago that his two daughters finally started sleeping in their own beds again. Until then, they had only felt safe right next to their dad. Kassie was sleeping in bed with him and Scarlett was on a single mattress on the floor.
“And that was what they wanted to do,” he said.
Mr Lovell said he also realised that part of it was that his children wanted to protect him.
“They kept saying to me ‘if you want us to stay in here then we’ll stay in here’,” he said.
“And part of me wanted to say ‘yeah, because I’m not ready for you to go out.’ I wasn’t ready, but I was like, ‘no, if that’s what you guys want to do, then that’s fine.’
Mr Lovell said once they went back to their own rooms, he had to come to terms with being alone in the room he once shared with his wife.
“I haven’t gotten used to it, I suppose it’s been pretty lonely. Just going to bed by yourself and waking up by myself,” he said.
“When you’re so used to going to bed with someone to then not. It sounds really soppy, but I suppose you get to the point – sometimes we’d go to bed and you know, hold hands type of thing, before you’d drift off.
“It was just really nice having that sort of connection, just being so happy with each other and to lose that it’s heartbreaking.”
The couple had been together for 22 years, slightly over half of Mr Lovell’s life. They moved from the UK to Australia in 2011 to start a better life.
Life without Ms Lovell has been an adjustment for the family. Mr Lovell says it’s an adjustment he may never get used to especially in this year of very tough firsts.
The first Mother’s Day, the first birthday, and the first Christmas.
“It was my birthday on the Saturday before Mother’s Day,” he said.
“I definitely felt the loss.
“I’m not saying she’s all I’ve ever known, but for most my adult life she’s been there with me so it’s slowly starting to sink in what a massive loss it is.”
“She was like, really funny at times, but she was also just like, so shy as well.”
Since Boxing Day, the whole family’s routine has now changed. Mr Lovell worked, paid the bills cooked the tea, while Ms Lovell was the one the girls would confide in. She was always there for her kids and they had such a close bond.
“They naturally sort of gravitated to her,” he said.
“But now I’ve sort of got to step into that role and her boots I suppose.”
Mr Lovell said he and his daughters had formed an even closer connection since the tragedy.
“In the past, Scarlett never really talked to me about I don’t know, maybe school, boys or whatever, you know, and she would always like tell Emma,” he said.
“But then when me and Emma were walking the dog, she’d often say ‘this is what’s going on with Scarlett but don’t tell them I told you’.”
“Now, I suppose they’ve got to talk about what’s going on in their lives and so I’m that person for them now.
Scarlett said it has been nice to become even closer with her dad.
“He’s a bit shocked when we are more open with him. We tell him about boys, how we feel or like school drama but it’s always really fun,” she said.
“But he’s always so chill about it, we never saw that side of him before that
It has been a lot to juggle without his wife and, at times he said he feels like he hasn’t had enough time to grieve because he doesn’t have many people to help.
“I suppose like it’s been lonely to be honest. Not having other people around to … be there to support us, moral support,” he said.
With all of his family still based in the UK, Mr Lovell said he has considered moving back there.
“But then I think like well, would I just be lonely in the UK,” he said.
“You know, I’d be lonely wherever I go just because you’ve got friends and family over there but like everyone’s still living their own lives.”
Mr Lovell said at times he had found himself on the couch trying to fight back tears as he thinks about the Boxing Day night.
At first, his daughters would ask about the evening and, at times, the family would “sit down and cry together” but eventually the questions fizzled out. Mr Lovell said his girls were very resilient.
But it all brings him to the days after the incident where he said more needed to be done to support victims of crime. After the incident two boys, both 17, were charged with Ms Lovell’s murder.
Mr Lovell said he felt more could be done to support the families of victims of crime.
“The next day (after Emma was killed), I felt like we didn’t really get any support,” he said.
“There almost needs to be someone that deals with this like a death doula or something.
“Like a social worker or something, you know, just someone that can even just someone that sat with us an had a cup of coffee.”
Mr Lovell said he felt as though youth offenders were getting more help than victims.
“It’s a little bit frustrating when you hear of youths today getting thrown almost as much help as they need with social workers and youth advocates and whoever,” he said.
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