Dark side of NRL, AFL footy grand finals laid bare

While footy fans are caught up in finals fever at this time of year, a social services group says it’s also time for them to brace for an influx of calls for help.

A domestic violence helpline is expecting a surge in calls over the next week with the number of referrals for men thinking about committing violence historically increasing by more than 30 per cent in the days following the AFL Grand Final.

The No To Violence’s Men’s Referral Service helps men who use violence acknowledge and change their behaviour through a series of counselling and intervention services.

In 2021, the number of men reaching out for support in the week following the AFL Grand Final increased by 34 per cent.

New data from the service has revealed calls overall are down by three per cent on last year’s national total of 7671 calls.

But the number of men successfully entering initial Brief Intervention Services had increased by 10 per cent from 1781 in 2020/21 to 1970 in 2021/22.

Men’s Referral Service’s advocacy and communications general manager Joanne Yates said the spike they see at this time of year is unlike any other.

“We have time of day spikes, day of the week spikes and we have time of year spikes,” Ms Yates said.

“Christmas and New Year bring stress and so do social events like sports seasons.”

The conversation around domestic violence is changing, with service providers saying educating abusers to know when to walk away and make a call to a service provider before they turn to violence is the best way to lower offending rates.

No to Violence’s Services Manager Dr Khaldoon Fahmi said the phone hotline for men was about shifting the burden of domestic and family violence from women and children who have to escape violence back onto the men who commit offences.

“It’s about being proactive, and not just reactive to violence in the household,” he said.

“If we can get to men who use violence or are coercively controlling a partner before things escalate too far, then we’re making a positive change in how we tackle all of this.”

All Men’s Referral Service phone operators are qualified counsellors who specialise in talking to men who exhibit behaviour like coercive control or use violence.

Ms Yates urged families to continue to evaluate behaviour for signs of coercive control and to seek help as soon as possible.

“It is about how people respond to those stressful stimuli that can drive them to abuse and violence,” she said.

“It is as simple as making a phone call, but oftentimes that‘s one of the hardest things for people to do; to recognise their need to seek help and make that call is tough.

“The more we talk about things like coercive control, particularly with the Inquiry into a matter as complex and devastating as the one of Hannah Clarke and Rowan Baxter and the more we shine a spotlight into the dark corners of these cases, the more people get to understand that they’re possibly going through that too.

“Men can evaluate their own behaviour, seek help, and acknowledge it is occurring.”

If you need support, help is available. The Men’s Referral Service is open to men using violence wishing to change their behaviour on 1300 766 491, while people impacted by domestic and family violence and abuse can call 1800 737 732.

Online and anonymous chat options are available, too.