Wycliff Palu’s inspiration and heartbreak as man he loved fought his own battle with silent strength of a warrior

IT was in the simple, poignant act of a grandfather picking up his grandchild that Wycliff Palu knew something was wrong.

Waratahs player Wycliff Palu for profile. Photo Jeremy Piper

IT was in the simple, poignant act of a grandfather picking up his grandchild that Wycliff Palu knew something was wrong.

Palu saw the bump on the chest of his father, Lua’anga’anga ­Kolokihakaufisi Palu, as he held the infant boy who bears his middle name.

“He picked up my son (Kolokihakaufisi) and I noticed it through his shirt,” Palu recalled.

“A couple of years ago he was diagnosed with bowel cancer, he got an operation and it got cleared. Then I saw this, late last year. It was like a boil that wouldn’t go away.

“I said, ‘We have to go to the doctors now’. Dad didn’t want to, he was acting like it was no big deal. I don’t know if he was scared, but he was one person who never wanted to hassle anyone. But I made him come with me.”

Sitting across from the doctor, the words were crippling for a giant who has made a living out of shattering rugby defences.

“He got a CT scan, it came back and the doc said the cancer had spread and they couldn’t operate,” Palu said.

“I was just crushed when I heard that. I turned to my dad and he just smiled.”

And he kept on smiling through the ensuing months, while his son found the strength to return to the rugby form that has marked him as one of world rugby’s most feared back-rowers.

Wycliff Palu at Allianz Stadium.

But when the Waratahs left for their tour of South Africa, Palu began receiving worrying messages about his father’s health.

By the time the team had flown to Perth on the return leg of the tour, Palu was told he should return home immediately.

“When I got back, my dad looked like a different person,” Palu said.

“When I’d left for South Africa he said, ‘See you later’. He was still walking around.

“I kept ringing him from over there, keeping in contact. He said he was feeling a lot better.

“But by the time I got back he could only whisper.”

Within days, aged 65, Palu’s father had passed away.

“The hardest thing was that, because he just kept saying to me that he was sweet, you think you will still get another Christmas together,” Palu said.

“He never really let on, he probably knew deep down that he was quite sick. But everyone got to say their goodbyes. He was a big part of the family, not just to me and my brothers and sisters, but to all my cousins.”

Palu said the support from the Waratahs staff, his teammates, and coach Michael Cheika during that heartbreaking period four weeks ago will never be forgotten.

“It was pretty amazing,” said Palu, who as one of the elder sons assumed much of the family leadership duties as is Tongan tradition, looking after a huge cast of visiting relatives.

He sat out the match against the Bulls, given those responsibilities and his crowded thoughts, and returned the following week off the bench against the Blues before starting in the thrilling victory over the Hurricanes.

When he runs out on to the Allianz Stadium turf on Sunday afternoon to charge into the Lions, Palu won’t be writing his dad’s name on wrist tape or pointing at the heavens.

“I have my own motivations in rugby, I won’t use my dad’s passing for that,” Palu said.

“He always kept me honest, when I first started, if I had a good game he wouldn’t really say it, there was always something I could work on.

“But once I started playing professionally, he left it up to me.

“He didn’t want to just talk about rugby all the time, it was good that way.

“That gave me a good balance away from the field.

“He was proud of me, but he treated all of my brothers and sisters equally.

“Just because I play rugby and play for the Wallabies, he never treated me any different.

“He looked at rugby as just something I did; it did not define me in his eyes.”

Perhaps the lasting message Mr Palu imprinted on his son was in the delighted act of picking up his grandchild.

When something was wrong, everything was right.