Family pauses to remember loved one lost too soon

For Warner’s Rebecca Beckwith and her children, Remembrance Day is one of those special days of the year they pause to remember Peter — the husband and father they miss every day.

Legacy widow Rebecca Beckwith and her children William and Ella. Picture: Hannah Photography

For Rebecca Beckwith and her children William and Ella, Remembrance Day is one of those special days of the year they pause to remember Peter — the husband and father they still miss every day.

Peter was just 29 years old when he died from a brain tumour in 2007. He had served as a Boatswains Mate and was deployed for active service on board HMAS Newcastle from 1999 to 2000.

“There aren’t too many days that go by that we don’t stop and think about Peter. It (Remembrance Day) is just one more of those special days throughout the year when we really stop and think,” Rebecca explains.

She and her children, aged four years and seven months old when their father died, marked their first Remembrance Day without Peter just three months after his passing.

Legacy widow Rebecca Beckwith's children William and Ella. Picture: Hannah Photography

It was tough, but they had the support of Legacy to help them through it. And it was Peter who urged Rebecca to phone Legacy when he knew the end was near.

His uncle worked for the organisation in Melbourne and Peter knew it would help his family after he was gone.

He died on August 11, a Saturday night, and Rebecca called Legacy on the Monday. A Legatee was on her doorstep the next day.

She was just 31 years old when she became a widow and says the practical and emotional support she received from Legacy and other widows was invaluable.

“The financial assistance, also being introduced to widows that could give it to me straight helped me,” she explains.

While she received support from family and friends, only other widows could truly understand how she was feeling. They helped her make the best of her family’s “new normal” and gave her practical advice no one else could.

It’s gone full-circle and now she is doing the same for other ‘new’ widows in her role as a Legacy community relations co-ordinator. She’s on standby to help new families as they reach out.

“I can see that look on their faces — the ocean-going tadpole,” she says.

Rebecca knows what’s ahead of them and knows in her heart they will be OK.

Legacy has helped her children, who have struggled along the way without their dad.

William, now 17, is looking forward to being part of the Legacy Youth Leaders program for young people aged 18-25 years who mentor younger children and go along to Legacy youth camps — which have been a big part of life for his family.

“He’s been asking since he was 12, ‘when can I do it’. It’s very close now,” Rebecca says.

Peter was a proud serviceman who regularly volunteered at Remembrance Day services, so Rebecca always attends one.

“The way I see it, there’s only two days in the year dedicated to remembering and honouring the guys and girls that have died for our country … I don’t think there are enough days,” she says.