Lourdes Hill College rocked by ‘toxic’ bullying culture claims in wake of tragic death of schoolgirl

A teacher at an elite Brisbane girls’ school has unloaded on high-level staff and how they’ve handled the fallout of a student’s bullying death, claiming they won’t even call her by her name and haven’t appropriately dealt with the culprits.

• Ella’s mum breaks silence: ‘I’m shattered’

Allegations of a “toxic” bullying culture at Lourdes Hill College have come to light following the tragic suicide of a former student last month.

Ella Catley-Crawford, 12, took her own life after being subjected to bullying from her peers on social media.

Parents of former students say the elite school hasn’t done enough to curb bullying, with one parent claiming that she had no choice but to change schools after her daughter was alienated by other students.

“It got so bad that she was sending me photos of her eating her lunch in the toilets as she had nowhere to sit because girls of other groups didn’t want to get involved and didn’t want to be next on the list,” she said.

“She didn’t attend the school for most of the last term due to the alienation and not having anywhere to go.”

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Ella Catley-Crawford took her own life after being subjected to bullying from her peers on social media.

The mum claims the school only called to inquire about her daughter’s attendance.

“I was utterly disgusted in the lack of care,” she said.

She said students were communicating through Snapchat, TikTok and Instagram after school.

“The thing with social media is nothing stays within a school community. It follows them home, where they are meant to feel safe. These girls have ‘friends’ from different schools, so you could slip over at lunchtime and everyone from every other school would know about it,” she said.

“They are all fighting for their place in the pecking order. It’s highly toxic.

“This group of girls were the ‘it’ group and could make or break you so to speak. They had alienated another girl earlier in the year and spread horrid rumours about her. Months later, it was my daughter’s turn.”

■ Faces of tragedy: How much more pain can we bear?

Lourdes Hill College in Hawthorne, Brisbane. Pic: Lyndon Mechielsen/Courier Mail

The mum said the group of girls then attempted to evade punishment by blaming her daughter.

“Once the messages go [on Snapchat], you can’t really retrieve them as a parent, so you really do rely on sometimes the other kids telling you what’s going on.”

A second parent told The Courier-Mail she believes the school is not equipped to handle the volume of students.

“[There are] over a thousand girls with all different environments and things going on at home. The school expect one cookie cutter profile,” she said.

The mum said she felt almost helpless when attempting to get the school to help her daughter.

“I had to almost beg them to work with me to help my daughter through a tough time, and I ended up crying daily with anxiety,” she said.

“I just think there are a lot of people that should be involved in helping girls get through this.”

Ella Catley-Crawford, 12 went to Lourdes Hill and Redlands College.

A former student shared a similar experience, describing her time at Lourdes Hill as “traumatic”.

“The school has always had a rife culture of bullying and cover-ups,” she said.

“The bullies would blatantly torment or threaten in person while at the school. People like me were isolated and alone. When I asked for help, I was vilified by the school and the bullies had no repercussions and just did it to other students instead.”

A college staff member has slammed the school for its “slow” approach to supporting staff and students, stating the college’s priority was its reputation.

The staff member, who wished to remain anonymous, said while counselling to students was offered from as early as Monday, parents were not informed of the incident until Tuesday afternoon.

Staff were initially told to direct students to their house pastoral leader should they wish to discuss what had happened to Ella.

By late Wednesday, staff were advised grade cohorts would be spoken to individually with Beyond Blue advice offered on how to navigate conversations on sensitive topics with students.

“They informed us that there had been reports about a former student on Monday - they did not use her name at all - but it had not been confirmed when asked what the reports were,” the staff member explained.

“They only confirmed what had happened the next day.

“They just kept saying the ‘incident’ and the ‘former student’ - they just keep calling her the former student. And I just feel like everyone knows her name. It’s out there.

Ella Catley-Crawford, 12 went to Lourdes Hill and Redlands College.

“We were first told if any students seemed distressed to listen to them and direct them to their house pastoral leader. We were also told that there would be extra counselling for staff and students.

The staff member said they were frustrated by how “slow” the school had reacted to Ella’s death.

“It is pretty upsetting. I am feeling a bit angry at the school, I hate that they won’t say her name,” the staff member said.

“As a staff member, I feel like the priority was to minimise the impact on the school’s reputation … they are just trying to cover themselves.

The staff member said it was “disappointing” that the offenders were still at the school despite a “zero-tolerance policy”.

“I’m also angry that they say zero tolerance, and the girls are still at the school, and (Ella) had to leave the school - that is what I don’t understand,” they said.

While the staff member appreciated the school’s acknowledgment that better practices to deal with mental health and wellbeing were needed, changes had to be implemented fast.

The staff member said professional development was required for teachers and staff on bullying and mental health.

“I feel like there should be more education for the students and parents especially on what bullying can lead to,” they added.

The staff member said an age limit of 16 needed to be set across all social media platforms.

“It seems that bullying has gotten worse since social media I feel that it is easier than bullying face-to-face,” they said.

“Also, a lot of them are too young and vulnerable to always make the right choices they want to grow up too fast though I think that education and guidance are important.”

Lourdes Hill College has been contacted for comment.

Parents at Redland College have been heartbroken by the tragic news of Ella’s death.

A father who wished to remain anonymous in order to protect his children’s identity said his son knew Ella, and he is now coming to terms with her passing.

“This school has very good policies about the way they manage [social media], it’s very good. The kids are being taught while here, it’s like we’re beating our heads against a brick wall and we can’t get through to the kids,” he said.

“My daughter is eight and my son is 11 and he knew Ella, there is only so much we can do, but if they get access to things like Snapchat, it scares me.”

With pressure mounting on the Federal Government to introduce legislation, the Redland College father said it’s “absolutely necessary” for age restrictions to be implemented for children under the age of 16.

“We’ve got forms of media the kids can use to talk to each other that deletes itself,” he said.

“I am trying to teach my kids, [I’ve] got a lot of rules in place there, it still frightens me because Ella’s mother tried to manage it, and just couldn’t.”

Another Redland Campus parent told the Courier Mail that while he monitors who his children interact with online he said he is unsure how the age restrictions for social media would be enforced.

“How do you verify you are over 16 when you sign up for a social media account? I don’t know the realities of it,” he said.

The Redland Campus father said both his children are on some forms of social media and he keeps an eye on who is accepted into his kids friends list.

“I think just knowing who your kids are talking to, knowing who their friends are,” he said.

“The eldest he plays Fortnite, so knowing who his friends are and who he can communicate with, and if need be just block all communication, but still allow him to use the app to play games.”

Bulimba MP Di Farmer appealed for donations for Ella’s mother on her Facebook.

“The entire community has been devastated to hear of the anguish and passing of beautiful Ella,” she said.

“But none, of course, more so than her family. It is almost impossible to imagine their grief.

“We send all our love and strength to them, and we wrap our arms around our own kids and hold them close.

“Please donate if you can.”