Four Brisbane mums show us the power of a mother’s love

What do a foster mum extraordinaire, a mother desperately trying to save the life of her young son, and an elite athlete have in common? How much they love their children. Today, we celebrate the incredible capabilities of four super mums.

Mums Shalyn Eggleton, Sandra Ehlers, Kim Ravaillion and Carmel Stewart. Picture: Liam Kidston

A foster mum extraordinaire who has helped raise over 30 children who are not bound to her by blood. A mother doing anything and everything she can to desperately save the life of her young son. An elite athlete showing her young daughter and many others that you can still chase your dreams while nurturing a family. And a mum who sacrifices most weekends and virtually any free moment she might get volunteering at her children’s sports. These women come from all walks of life but there’s one thing they all have in common: how much they love their children. Today the Sunday-Mail celebrates their incredible capacities.

Mum Kim Ravaillion. Picture: Liam Kidston

KIM RAVAILLION

There’s not likely to be any high teas or long lunches for Queensland Firebirds Captain Kim Ravaillion today – her Mother’s Day weekend will be spent like most others – travelling all over the country captaining an elite squad of netballers.

She knows her career won’t last forever but that doesn’t make the juggle of caring for her daughter Georgie, 3, training and travelling to play any easier.

It’s a busy schedule made even trickier by the fact her fiance, and Georgie’s dad, Adam Treloar is based in Melbourne where he plays AFL for the Western Bulldogs.

“I mean, it’s not easy, it does take a village as they say, I’m lucky enough to have my mum up here who is my babysitter – Georgie’s second mum,” she said.

“So we are just working and living our careers while we can because that’s not going to last forever.”

The 29-year-old, who originally hails from New South Wales, describes herself as one of the lucky athletes who managed to get a contract just a year after having her child.

“I just went straight back into my training again but I was pretty lucky in terms of my recovery after birth. I was back running after two weeks,” she said.

“There’s still so much more that can be done in terms of you know, allowing women to not just be mums, we can go back and work and make it work and there shouldn’t be the (expectation) that once you become a mum, that’s it. Your life is over.

“You can still have kids and support them and achieve your goals and dreams. So I guess that was my biggest thing was after becoming a mum, it became a real focal point.”

And although little Georgie is still too young to properly understand the significance of the day she’ll be just as proud as she always is of her mum – win or lose.

“When you have a kid you stop worrying about yourself, like your focus and everything just goes into the little being you created,” she said.

“It gives you a sense of perspective, even when I have a bad game or a good game, it doesn’t really matter, I get to go home and I’ve got my life. I think it just makes (everything) better.”

Mum Sandra Ehlers. Picture: Liam Kidston

SANDRA EHLERS

There is a five metre wall that runs along the toy room in Sandra Ehler’s home and it’s filled with photos capturing special people and moments that her foster children call “the jigsaw wall”.

There is a frame with the word family in the middle and it’s surrounded with an eclectic bunch of photos of the kids together, them with their biological family, them with their foster family.

“It’s so they can see that mishmash of who makes up their family. Their family is more than blood it’s also the people that stand up and come forward for them,” she said.

“Mummy is not hidden, nanny is not hidden, aunties and uncles aren’t hidden. It’s not a shameful secret to have two families. It is just celebrated and it’s there for them to see who their family is, because we consider their biological family our extended family as well.”

Sandra and her husband have permanent care of the siblings – just two of the 31 children they have had in their care over the years.

Sandra is a second generation foster carer – having grown up in a home where her parents fostered and her husband was a child in care – raised in kinship care by his grandmother.

But with two biological children of their own, who are now adults, it was a family decision when they first decided to open their homes to children who needed it 12 years ago.

“So between us, we feel that we can give that you know, really balanced level of support and understanding to children,” she said.

With that much experience there’s probably no person better placed to answer the question: what makes a mum?

“Providing structure, love, empathy, validation, to me a mum is a warm hug and a hot meal, just safety basically,” she said.

“But it’s more than just food and a roof over your head. It’s that structure, a lot of our kids in care feel like they’re in free fall so to have that knowledge of what’s happening when makes them feel safe.

“I think that’s part of being a mum advocating for them to have the things that they’re supposed to have.”

Mum Carmel Stewar. Picture: Liam Kidston

CARMEL STEWART

Carmel Stewart always knew she wanted to be a mum and amid the “organised chaos” of her life, she raises her four children.

Her family home in the suburbs of Brisbane pays homage to a life full of love and loyalty, but between working at her kids tuckshop, volunteering at their football club and taxiing her children Carmel is barely there.

“My day usually starts at around 5pm, at the tuckshop and getting my kids places, then it’s volunteering at the football club as the secretary and then its dropping the kids at training or something; I wouldn’t have it any other way though,” she said.

“I had my first born at 17 and back then it was hard to watch your friends go out to parties but now I love being a mum, I can keep up with them all.”

Carmel dedicates her life to “rolling with the punches” and between raising her 18, 16, 13 and 10-year-old she still manages to enjoys being a mother; a job she describes as a blessing.

“Honestly, I live by the mantra of ‘have fun’. If you not loving what you do then you can change, I think there’s a misconception that mum’s are stuck but it is OK to change,” she said.

“It’s all hands on deck most of the time, myself and my kids don’t get home at night until around 8pm but for me it’s time well spent if I’m with them.

“Mother’s day to me is a celebration of everyone, not the high profile mums or famous mums. It’s the everyday hardworking mum who would do anything for her children – I hope my kids know that I would do anything for them.”

Mateoh Eggleton with his mum Shalyn Eggleton. Picture: Liam Kidston

SHALYN EGGLETON

For the past four years, Shalyn Eggleton has devoted every moment of her life to being by her son’s side, tirelessly navigating the countless hospital visits and medical procedures with unwavering strength and determination.

Not once has she given up hope.

Her second born Mateoh was diagnosed with a debilitating genetic illness at just two-years-old and from that day, Shalyn has spent every waking minute ensuring her son gets the treatment he needs.

“When I reflect on the past couple of years I definitely didn’t think we would be here, I thought like every other mother I would have a happy, healthy baby boy,” she said.

“Watching your child go through that it’s nothing you can ever imagine and something you never have to want to deal with.

“You have to keep going and can’t stop, you keep doing what you can for your little people.”

Shalyn who is also the mother of three other children, has had to watch her children go through the pain of watching their brother collapse due to his illness.

“It is just me – my family aren’t around and I am a single mum, we do our best and as a family we try and make everything work,” she said.

“I am very lucky to have the children I have.”

Shalyn has now had to come to terms with the fact that Australian medicine can no longer help her sick child and has had to look elsewhere for treatment.

“I am now in the process of enlisting help from a Singapore hospital and we are in the final stages of talks with the medical team over there.”

“Reflecting on what I have had to go through is that when your child is sick it’s knowing that mums play an important role – we are a part of that fight too, not just them.”

“It’s important to remember when you are going through stuff life this is that you’re your child’s biggest advocator, no one will fight for your child like you can,” she said.

“Your motherly instinct is the most vital thing in a fight like this. That’s what mothers day is all about.”