Susie O’Brien: 1980s classic flicks don’t seem to be as enthralling for the iPhone generation
Movie night seems like the perfect way to get ourselves through stage four. But trying to introduce the iPhone generation to much-loved classics from the ‘80s has been a massive flop, writes Susie O’Brien.
Susie O'Brien
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How are you all going?
Crawling through the kitchen bin to find my son’s retainer was the highlight of my week.
There’s not much to do in lockdown but watch TV.
Even the excitement of a late-night supermarket run has been taken away from us.
In our house we’ve started holding family movie nights.
My partner and I — both gen Xers — want our kids, who range in age from eight to 16, to love the movies we love.
Kids! Grab the popcorn! Let’s watch the best-rated movie of 1980!
What could go wrong?
Choosing a movie is the first hurdle.
Pick any movie you think we’ll all like, I tell my youngest. Anything. Whatever you want.
He says: How about Jumanji?
I say: No, anything but that.
By this time, the kids have lost interest in the whole idea of family togetherness, leaving me to pick the movie.
I invariably tell them to watch whatever I choose for at least 15 minutes, then get stroppy when they want to stop watching after 15 minutes.
I don’t know why don’t they love the movies I love — especially the ones I adored at their age, like The Goonies, Honey, I Shrunk the Kids, or Annie.
While we’re watching these great movies, the kids are peeking at their phones hidden in their laps and trying not to stifle yawns.
“Oh, I remember this bit! Kids, watch this, it’s classic,” we say.
“Oh so funny — watch!!!”
But they found Fargo weird, violent and boring. Die Hard was “too slow”. Babe’s talking animals were “unrealistic”.
Even ET left them wanting. It was “too sad” and they didn’t really get it.
“Why couldn’t he just ring home on his iPhone?”
This younger generation will watch TikToks full of kids mouthing to lame Keeping Up with the Kardashian clips, but will yawn their way through Gremlins, Top Gun, St Elmo’s Fire and The Breakfast Club.
Such movies, which have spurned many copies over the years, are not original enough to hold their attention. They don’t care that these are the originals.
Flying High — one of my all-time faves — lost my kids completely.
I know what you are thinking. Surely, you can’t be serious. Don’t call me Shirley. See? I know funny and that’s funny.
I sought advice from other parents who told me their kids’ willingness to enjoy movies like
Police Academy, The Sixth Sense and 50 First Dates have been entirely dependent on taking away their phones first.
They, too, had experienced the difficulty getting kids to watch films they hadn’t ever heard of, were made before they were born and didn’t star The Rock in his underwear.
One told me her kids “lasted about 10 minutes with Lord of the Rings”. Another said her daughter “hated” Muriel’s Wedding. And another said she “tortured” her son with The Titanic.
Where’s the respect for such box office gold?
I have to admit some movies haven’t stood the test of time well.
Sixteen Candles, which I loved as a teenager, seemed a bit off. It’s about a teen (Molly Ringwald) whose family forgets her 16th birthday. Maybe it was the scene where the geeks sell peeks at the star’s underwear.
The kids didn’t get it either. No parents forget birthdays, they told me, rolling their eyes. It’s always in their phones.
Eww, gross.
We had more luck with Back to the Future, Ferris Beuller’s Day Off and National Lampoons Vacation, even though the latter had more nudity and sexual references than I remembered.
But I still couldn’t win. My kids had seen Vacation, the remake from 2015 and preferred it. When your kids like the remake more than the original, you have to hang your head in shame.
Even Back to the Future didn’t hold their attention for all three movies, with one telling me
the “CGI looks fake”. Well, it was 1989, so what can you expect?
“I just don’t get it,” said one of my kids. “How can you go back to the future? Wouldn’t you go forward to the future and back to the past?”
Then he told me he had just remembered he had a chemistry test to learn for. Sigh.
One friend gave me a terrific suggestion.
“Put on Contagion and give them a reality check,” she said.
Great idea. Let’s watch a movie about a global pandemic that kills millions around the globe.
Hey kids, grab the popcorn, Mum’s chosen a movie ...
Susie O’Brien is a Herald Sun columnist
Originally published as Susie O’Brien: 1980s classic flicks don’t seem to be as enthralling for the iPhone generation