Mike O’Connor: The monarchy is ours for years to come thanks to the Australian Republican Movement

We’ve put up with our share of dumb and dumber over the past two years but the republicans’ plan for abandoning the monarchy takes the prize for the dumbest, writes Mike O’Connor

If the Queen happened to be in town this week, I’d invite her around for lunch on Wednesday.

We’ve already got seven for Australia Day lunch and one more wouldn’t make any difference.

She’d have to lose the hat and wear an Aussie flag headband – Aussie headbands for the ladies and Aussie sunnies worn on top of the head for the blokes – and we could probably add a Union Jack to the Australian flags that will be the centre piece of the table decoration.

After several litres of Australian shiraz and chardonnay, there’ll be a rousing rendition of Advance Australia Fair and as a courtesy to Her Maj, I’m sure we could manage to add God Save the Queen to the repertoire before we got into the serious stuff – Jimmy Barnes singing Khe Sanh and Men at Work belting out Land Down Under.

Before things got too out of hand, I’d confess to HRH that I was taught by my Irish forebears to detest all things British and in particular the royal family.

I did as I was told and have been a determined republican but no more thanks to the puerile pronouncements of the Australian Republican Movement which have ensured that AustraIia will remain a constitutional monarchy for many years to come.

I understand that she is otherwise engaged which is shame as I’m sure she would have enjoyed the break from the idiot family with which she has been cursed. Another time, perhaps.

The O’Connor family will have flags aplenty at their Australia Day gathering. Picture: David Crosling

We’ve put up with our share of dumb and dumber public pronouncements over the past two years but the republicans’ plan for abandoning the monarchy and electing a president takes the prize for the dumbest.

The proposal is for Australians to elect a president from up to 11 candidates who would be chosen by the state and federal parliaments.

Just what we need – more politicians nominated by other politicians.

Former NSW Labor premier Bob Carr underlined the obvious flaws in this plan when he said that the result would be a new head of state, elected by a drawn-out selection process at a national ballot who would think they had a mandate of their own and were superior to that of the prime minister.

It would, he said, be a drawn-out beauty parade of up to 11 contenders with state parliaments recruited for the exercise who could claim they had a mandate to govern and who could be at odds with the PM.

Can you imagine the line-up of wannabe hopefuls, desperate to restore their former relevance and with far too much time on their hands, who would be leaning on their comrades in state and federal parliament to nominate them for the role?

It would be the mates looking after the mates in the finest traditions of Australian political life.

President Turnbull or President Rudd, anyone? Our very own former premier Peter Beattie has said that he thinks that the republican proposal has merit.

President Beattie, perhaps? By proposing a scenario that is devoid of merit and adds another political layer to the most over-governed country on earth the republicans have consigned their aspirations to the national periphery for another 10 years.

The Queen has put up with enough this year already. (Photo by Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images)

Her Maj will be looking at her 80th anniversary by then although she is probably hoping that by 2032, she will have gone to the eternal reward to which most of us would agree she so richly deserves.

None of our lunchtime guests are likely to be named Australian of the Year unless playing the air guitar has become a prerequisite for that singular honour but let’s hope that whoever gets the nod behaves like one.

Grace Tame, the current older of that title, used her appointment to build her public profile and in the process politicised the role, attacking the federal government, appearing to favour the Labor Party and blessing us with her personal slant on policy. It was an unedifying spectacle.

The conversation around the table will inevitably turn to Covid and who knows someone who knows someone who has it or had it and the travails of the past year and the uncertainties that it appears will persist through 2022.

There will be agreements and disagreements but if there will be one point of common ground, it will be the belief that we are fortunate to live in one of the most prosperous and stable democracies on the planet.

We often make light Americans’ propensity to wear their national pride on their sleeves but it wouldn’t hurt us to do the same, if only once a year – God bless Australia!