Charlotte Dawson: Haunted to the end by her inner demons
IT seemed like the final, inevitable episode of a tragic soap opera: Charlotte Dawson - who spent many of her adult years battling depression - ended her life aged 47.
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IN the end it seemed like the final, inevitable episode of a tragic soap opera: Charlotte Dawson — the model, TV star and social crusader who spent many of her adult years battling depression — ended her life at the age of 47.
It is understood Dawson was found hanged in her luxury Woolloomooloo Finger Wharf apartment by a security guard on Saturday morning, the day after the birthday of her ex-husband and the man she still described as the love of her life - disgraced Olympic swimmer Scott Miller.
The guard was responding to a call from a real estate agent who was due to hold an open house at the apartment but hadn’t been able to reach Dawson on her mobile phone.
Friends, already worried about her mental state in recent weeks, had also become alarmed when they realised her Twitter account — the social media site on which she was a constant contributor — had remained untouched for more than 18 hours.
As the news spread, a sense of inevitability pervaded the outpouring of grief. The truth is that well before Dawson’s death, ripples had been circulating throughout Sydney’s celebrity circles that the TV presenter was in a “bad place” and whispers of a possible suicide attempt were uttered more than once.
“She was in very bad shape emotionally. Terrible shape,” said one close friend, who asked not to be named. “She had failed to show up to a lunch a couple of days ago, and then when I had seen she hadn’t tweeted in almost a day it was clear something was wrong.”
Dawson was struggling financially and had borrowed up to $80,000 from friends as she battled to make the rent on her $1200-a-week apartment.
Adding to her money woes was her axing from the popular Foxtel TV show Australia’s Next Top Model. Her dismissal after six years was a particularly sore point after she was nominated for a Best Presenter Logie for her work on the show.
It was Madeline Huett, her friend and former contestant on the show, who formally identified Dawson’s body.
Highs and lowsHIGHS - Leaves home in New Zealand at 16 to become a Ford model in New York - Moves to Australia to become fashion director at Woman’s Day - Marries Olympic silver medal-winning swimmer Scott Miller in 1999 - In 2000, becomes the face of Peter Morrissey fashion line - Joins Channel Ten’s E! News as a fashion correspondent - Popularity soars while appearing on Ten’s hit daytime show Beauty and the Beast - Joins Nine’s Today program as a fashion editor - Becomes judge on Australia’s Next Top Model in 2007 LOWS - Divorces a year after marriage amid allegations Miller had sex with another women. Miller denied he cheated. - Faces a backlash after describing New Zealand as “small, nasty and vindictive” in a tell-all newspaper interview - Engages in a vicious online war against Twitter trolls - Admitted to St Vincents Hospital in 2012 after attempting to commit suicide, tweeting: “You win x” - Gives an interview a week later on Nine’s 60 Minutes, revealing she had received death threats - Is linked to a string of ‘bad boys’, including nightclub promoter John Ibrahim - Returns from a “healing holiday” in Bali to find her Sydney apartment “completely trashed” by her house-sitter |
The New Zealand-born Dawson’s career suffered another major blow last year when she was dropped by her long-time management company, Chic Celebrity Management.
Dawson’s personal life was also traumatic after she split in July from her most recent lover, real estate broker Tyrone Corban, 24 years her junior.
But friends believe she had never really gotten over her marriage to Miller, which ended in divorce after only a year. In her tell-all autobiography Air Kiss And Tell, she revealed she had an abortion because the pregnancy would interfere with Miller’s preparation for the 2000 Olympics — and blamed that for the start of her long battle with depression.
Just last week Dawson admitted she still loved Miller and wished him the best in the wake of his recent 12-month suspended sentence for drug possession.
But. while appearing to struggle professionally, Dawson spoke enthusiastically of her future in an interview with NineMSN last month.
She said: “I cleared the decks last year so 2014 is going to be productive and I’m determined to lay the foundations for my future. I’ve taken on a new role working with my dear friend Billy Allen for his homeware line. I’m going to be doing more producing, writing and, of course, my telly gigs.”
She also appeared to have found some purpose in the past two years as an anti-bullying advocate, and had documented her struggles with depression via her Twitter account following a highly publicised suicide attempt in September 2012.
On that occasion Dawson had received “ferocious” death threats from several Twitter trolls before finally signing off with the post “you win” and a picture of a hand holding tablets. She also tweeted: “Hope this ends the misery.”
She was released from hospital after spending two days under observation at St Vincent’s Psychiatric Emergency Care Centre.
The experience prompted Dawson to spearhead an anti-bullying campaign in The Sunday and Daily Telegraphs, becoming vocal on the topic across the talk show and magazine circuit.
In an interview with Who Weekly, Dawson told of her plastic surgery and how she believed the media’s relationship with body image was becoming increasingly destructive.
She admitted to having an eye lift, a breast operation, Botox, fillers and fat transfer procedure.
She said: “There are two things that disturb me — the extent of the procedures that young, beautiful girls are having and that some of them are doing it for publicity. They need to remember they have young fans who are 12 and 13.”
For those mourning Dawson, she was a women who lived a life full of contradictions: an advocate of strong women who succumbed to countless cosmetic surgery procedures; an unapologetic single woman who still yearned for her first love and rode a roller-coaster of relationship misfires.
Her former agent Mark Byrne, who managed Dawson from 2000 to 2010 and remained her friend, said: “Charlotte was a mentor, a loyal friend, a client and great mate; above all Charlotte was a lot of fun.
‘CHARLOTTE DAWSON’S HEART WAS MADE OF SOMETHING VERY RARE’
CELEBRITIES AND FRIENDS OF CHARLOTTE DAWSON PAY TRIBUTE
JMO: HOW CHARLOTTE DAWSON HELPED ME WORK THROUGH DEPRESSION
ALEX PERRY: MY BEAUTIFUL, WITTY, INTELLIGENT AND FUNNY FRIEND
RUSSELL CROWE’S HEARTACHE AT DAWSON’S DEATH
CELEBRITIES AND FRIENDS PAY TRIBUTE TO DAWSON
“Each memory is full of laughs.
“I will miss and remember Charlotte for her energy and fun, and I celebrate her legacy.”
Her sister Vicky Dawson told the New Zealand Herald: “We’re absolutely devastated.
“We miss her terribly and that’s all we want to say at the moment.”
It is expected Vicky and her other sister Robin Barclay will travel from Auckland to Sydney to accompany her body back to New Zealand.
For support and information about suicide prevention, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or Suicide Call Back Service on 1300 659 467.
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