Rory Gibson: How to be a better man

No real man would ever admit they have flaws, says Rory Gibson, but every man does. He shares his tips for men on how they can be better.

All around us are people about whom we know nothing, and never will. They are just part of the human backdrop that colours our space.

But occasionally a stranger can catch the eye, and something about them ignites your curiosity.

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There’s a bloke I see about town who has me intrigued. I often spy him sitting in a cafe. He’s always alone, and always reading. What made me notice him the first time was the book he was perusing. I can’t remember its exact title but it was along the lines of “How to be a Better Man”.

Rory Gibson encourages all men to do better to improve themselves.

Why would you read a book like that in public? The title would lead people to draw the obvious conclusion that one has flaws. No real man would ever admit to that.

I was in the same cafe and while idling over a flat white I amused myself thinking what I would put in such a book.

There’d be a chapter on fashion - focused mainly on the pitfalls of bum-crack exposure and why cargo pants should be banned.

Flatulence. That would definitely require some attention. Up to the age of 15 farting is hilarious in company but should become a private pleasure after that. Deliberately trapping a partner under the doona after dropping a whiff bomb will also ruin your sex life. Too many men don’t get that.

There’d be some tips on conversation. Men like to reminisce about their sporting glories, but no one needs to hear in detail about the tries you scored when you were playing footy 40 years ago. And don’t talk about cars. They’re not interesting. Or your work, unless you’re a spy or a hitman.

During this rambling I took a sneaky look at the enigmatic stranger and wondered what had happened in his life to make him attempt self-improvement. Was it divorce, a crime, estrangement from a child or some perceived inadequacy?

Actually, I don’t want to know. But I wish him well in his quest for betterment.

Now, back to the chapter on picking your nose while driving.