Joel Creasey: Nobody cares for Carols by Candlelight’s child stars

Yes, Christmas is about family. But when the kids take to the stage at Carols by Candlelight , that’s when Joel Creasey is getting up to pour himself another drink.

Joel Creasey loves Carols by Candlelight.

A few weeks back I promised a column dedicated to the legendary Carols by Candlelight. Now you’ll have to excuse me as I’m a Perth boy originally so when I refer to Carols by Candlelight, I’m also referring to Carols in the Domain. Blasphemy! I know that one is the weekend before Christmas and the other the night before. I also know they’re on competing networks. I also know one year Sonia Kruger, as host, did several wardrobe changes which I thought was a major flex. But because I wasn’t raised with that fierce Melbourne v Sydney rivalry, I’m not entirely sure of the differences. And let’s be honest, there’s not a hell of a lot of carols, sparkly dresses and former
X Factor contestants out there so they do tend to all blend into one.

What I do know is, while it would be a complete travesty if these events weren’t to be held as they epitomise all things festive and fabulous … it’s also a beloved national sport to make fun of both events.

Delta Goodrem dazzles at Carols by Candlelight. Picture: Valeriu Campan

My biggest wonder each year is how the songs are divvied up. Who gets what. Silent Night for example. Absolute banger. That’s your top shelf Christmas Carol. Does Tina Arena or Delta Goodrem automatically get handed it? It sure feels that way. Or is it more of a lottery system? That seems more fun, but a little risky potentially pairing up Hark the Herald Angels Sing with, say, High-5.

Obviously, Mariah’s All I Want For Christmas Is You is always a hotly contested song and normally goes to a former Australian Idol winner. I always get a thrill when the cast of a currently touring musical get a little outing. You can always see which cast member has been sucking up to the company director to get the high note and better position on stage.

Then you have your Carols staples … we’re talking your Marina Priors, Denis Walters and Lucy Duracks. Controversially, Rhonda Burchmore hasn’t been invited to perform at Carols this year. A flurry of furious messages were sent among my group when Rhonda went full messy B and went to the press with it. I mean, it truly isn’t Christmas without legs eleven Rhonda Burchmore. Rest assured we’ll be firing up some old clips of Rhonda on YouTube the night before to get us in that Chrissie mood. Failing that I’ll dial her up on FaceTime.

Let’s be honest, nobody cares for any child “star” or “competition winner” on that stage. Yes, Christmas is about family. Yes, Christmas is very much for the children. But that’s the point in the show I’m getting up to pour myself another drink and work out whether it’s wrong to get into the brandy custard the day before.

So just know I’ll be watching Carols. No matter the channel. No matter the city. No matter who is on stage (unless they are a child). And yes, I will be commentating every last second of it. And any comments that are appropriate (if any) will no doubt make an appearance on my Twitter. See you in 2021!

Originally published as Joel Creasey: Nobody cares for Carols by Candlelight’s child stars