‘It is time to give to each other’: Li Cunxin and wife Mary on stepping away, and the fight ahead

Li Cunxin and wife Mary reveal to Frances Whiting the health struggles of the past year, and what lies ahead as they announce that they will step down from Queensland Ballet.

He was a boy from an impoverished rural commune in China, she was a girl from Rockhampton, Queensland, and when they met almost 40 years ago, Li Cunxin and his wife Mary embarked on what Li now describes as “a magical journey”.

Married in 1987, it is a journey that has seen the former principal dancers perform on the world’s stages, and transform the fortunes of the Queensland Ballet company.

It is a journey that has produced three children, two best selling books, a major motion picture, many accolades and awards, and it has taken them here, sitting together in their Brisbane home, sharing why one part of that journey is coming to its end.

Li Cunxin and wife Mary at their home on Monday.

Li has announced that due to serious health concerns - he has heart issues, and Mary has cancer - he is stepping away from his 11 year tenure as artistic director of the Queensland Ballet. Mary is also leaving her ten year role as its Ballet Mistress.

Li describes their twin health battles as “very challenging” but adds that the couple will face them, as they have faced everything over the past four decades - together.

“We both have major health issues,’’ Li said.

“Mary has been struggling for the last 10 months, for me it’s been the last seven months, and we have both been in and out of hospital. We have kept working, but one of the considerations we have had to face is that we are both struggling to do our jobs. They are very demanding, and very tiring. Particularly, in my position, the days are very long. There are lots of evenings and weekends that are taken up, apart from the formal roles.

Li Cunxin, in his days as a dancer.

“We want to see as many of the shows as possible, so that can be around 100 a year that we go to, and while we want to be there, it is a massive commitment. There’s also the community engagement, donor engagement, government engagement, corporate engagement and of course, the Academy, that is very close to our hearts, and while it has been wonderful to have all of that engagement and responsibility, we now need to look after each other, and for me, I very much want to look after Mary.’’

Mary smiles at the man she met while she was Principal Dancer at the London Festival Ballet in the mid 1980’s and he was visiting London as Principal Dancer for the touring Houston Ballet.

“I think for both of us this has come as a big shock because the two of us were so healthy,” she says.

“I have barely had a sick day in my life, so it’s something that has taken some getting used to, particularly as we are both facing health challenges together.”

Li nods and adds that the couple, after formally stepping away from the Queensland Ballet, intend to “mostly just be together’’.

Li Cunxin, artistic director of Queensland Ballet, in the studios with his dancers.

“We just don’t know what’s around the corner for us in terms of our health, so for the quality of life that we have remaining, we really want to spend it together and with our families,’’ he says.

“We hope we may be able to travel a little together, and just do a few of the things we haven’t had time for.”

The couple are beloved in artistic circles, known for their giving natures; of their time, expertise, mentoring of young dancers, and their hospitality, opening their doors to welcome guests into their beautiful, light-filled Brisbane home filled with images, books, costumes and mementos of their life of dance.

“I think for both of us, life has always been about other people, for me, my family in China, and for Mary with her family also, and of course, our dancers. For us we have lived our whole lives through ballet, and for the last ten years of so, Queensland Ballet has come first, and everything else has worked around it. And we have loved every minute, but now it is time to give to each other” Li says.

Li Cunxin, artistic director of Queensland Ballet, in studio with his talented dancers.

“In our hearts we will never be too far away from Queensland Ballet and we will continue to do whatever we can to support them but for the time being, we have to focus on getting our health back on track.”

They both say the decision to leave the company has been difficult, with Mary saying that she is “struggling to imagine life without it’’.

“I will miss it terribly, I will miss the music, but I will try to do a bit here and there and Li and I might do a barre together (the couple have a ballet bar installed in their home) for exercise and our brains, music and ballet will always be a part of our lives in some way,’’ she says.

It always has been - Mary trained as a dancer growing up in Rockhampton, Queensland, while Li studied at the Beijing Dance Academy in China before famously defecting to join the Houston Ballet in the late seventies.

Li Cunxin and Mary Li returned to the stage to perform in Manon.

It was during his time with that company he first saw a young dancer called Mary McKendry perform, and was, he smiles now, instantly “enchanted”.

“She was dancing with the London Festival (now the English National Ballet) and she was extraordinary. She was beautiful. She was gorgeous. I watched her and I was stunned. The next day she came to see the Houston Ballet and I remember I saw this girl with big fluffy hair and I thought “That looks like Mary McKendry” and I rushed down to say hello but she just kept looking away. She had zero interest in me.” Mary laughs.

“It wasn’t that, it was because I had snuck away from my own company to see the Houston Ballet and if my director had found out I would have been in big trouble, so I was trying to be incognito.” Li persisted and says he believes they were “perhaps fated” to be together.

“You know, my parents always thought I would marry a nice Chinese girl and look after her, because that is their culture, but instead I met this rather, wild spirited Queenslander from Rockhampton and set off on this magical journey.”

Li Cunxin and wife Mary Li at home.

And while the couple say, they say they are not sure where it will take them next, or even what it might look like, they will continue on the next phase of their journey together, still making magic.