Frances Whiting reveals the best gift to give this Christmas

Forget chocolates, jewellery or expensive designer goods, Frances Whiting has found the ultimate present that no one will complain about.

First of all, thank you for your letters sharing your household’s “third drawer down” stories with me.

A Sydney reader shared that his family calls this drawer, the “Where the Hell” drawer – short for Where the Hell Is It? Some of you also sent photos of your drawers (to be clear, the household variety, don’t get any ideas) and all I can say is none of you can have Marie Kondo over for Christmas. Or ever, really.

Speaking of Christmas, it’s almost upon us, that means that right now someone somewhere in Australia is watching Love Actually, and absolutely seething at Harry (Alan Rickman) for not giving Karen (Emma Thompson) that damn necklace.

Each holiday season, Love Actually appears in the annual lists of most watched Christmas films, along with It’s a Wonderful Life, Home Alone, The Holiday, and, weirdly, Die Hard.

If you haven’t seen Love Actually, here’s a short recap of the scene that has had women shouting at their television screens since 2003; Karen finds a beautiful necklace in her husband Harry’s coat pocket and believes it is her Christmas gift from him.

Later on Christmas Day she unwraps his present to discover it is not said, shiny necklace, but a sodding Joni Mitchell CD. Poor woman, as if discovering her husband is a lying, cheating cad is not depressing enough, she now has to sob her way through Both Sides Now as well.

It’s an iconic scene, along with many others in the film, some of which have stood the test of time better than others. Specifically, the scene when a bloke turns up at his best mate’s house with a set of giant, white cards to silently show his mate’s wife, declaring his love for her.

Now when the film first came out, we all thought this man was adorable, but on reflection we have realised he was, in fact, a stalker.

Nor does what is written on his cards hold up, beginning with “Just because it’s Christmas, and at Christmas you tell the truth”. Really? Do we tell the truth at Christmas time? Because frankly I think Christmas is a time when we tell all sorts of lies, from little white ones to some absolute whoppers.

These include “You’re bringing an extra, random guest to Christmas lunch who I have not accounted for? What fun!” “Oh, look, your uncle is going to recite another one of his original poems, how lovely!” and “I cannot wait for your family to come and stay for an indeterminate amount of time, I think half the fun is in the not knowing, don’t you?”

But while I may be cynical about this particular sentiment, there’s another one in the film that remains rock solid. It’s in the film’s opening scene of people reuniting at Heathrow Airport. The one where the narrator reminds us that in the midst of the horror of 9/11 the victims sent messages of love to their families. Not, as you might expect, words of hate, or revenge.

That the core truth in the end; the very best gift we can give one another, especially as our world once again shudders at all sorts of terrors, is the one I wish for each and every one of you this Christmas. It’s love, actually.