Bride reveals key to surviving heartbreaking Covid delays
Feeling very sad after having to postpone their wedding due to Covid, this Brisbane couple made a pact that got them through.
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Faced with a 12-month delay to tie the knot due to the unfolding pandemic, this couple made two important commitments to each other.
To mark the original date they planned to marry by doing something special and to marry on their rescheduled date, regardless of the circumstances – even if it was an intimate ceremony with just them and a celebrant.
“On July 18, 2020, our original wedding date, we took our bridal party out for dinner at the Hellenika restaurant at Calile Hotel,’’ Josephine McKendry says.
“It was an emotional day but we made the most of it. The dinner was beautiful and felt like a celebration in itself. I highly recommend marking your original wedding date by doing something special.’’
The East Brisbane couple, who have been together for almost four years, rescheduled their wedding to June 12 this year, and married at the Calile Hotel in front of 100 guests.
Josephine wore a customised Karen Willis Holmes gown, with a seamstress adding pleated organza to the sleeves, split and neckline.
They danced their first dance to Snare by Cosmo’s Midnight and honeymooned at Mount Mulligan Lodge and Lizard Island.
How did you meet?
At Alfred and Constance in the Valley, through a mutual friend.
How did he propose?
In Paris. In our beautiful Airbnb.
We had spent the day sightseeing and we were about to go to bed, Brad proposed in the living room, it was intimate and so, so special. Brad proposed with his late mum’s friendship ring that Brad’s dad had given her.
We designed the engagement ring and wedding ring together.
Engagement ring details?
Artisans Bespoke Jewellers at Paddington. Tammy and the team were so lovely and helpful. We came in with a few photos and ideas, and together we sketched a design and picked out the stones.
The engagement ring is an Australian blue sapphire with baguette diamonds. It’s an art deco- inspired ring and the wedding ring is a tiara style plain yellow gold ring that matches it perfectly.
What was the standout moment?
The speeches. I was blown away by the touching words.
What would you do differently?
Set up a website and include it on the invitation. Particularly when we needed to postpone due to COVID-19, it was challenging keeping track of everyone’s details in a spreadsheet. A website would have been much easier.
I forgot to throw the bouquet!
Hire some lounges for guests who might not want to dance but also don’t want to be sitting at the table the entire evening.
Spend more time with the family at the reception, particularly those who had made the effort to travel interstate. It just went so quickly we felt like it wasn’t enough time with everyone.
What would you spend more or less on?
I would spend more on hiring additional furniture beyond what the hotel included in the package. At the time, the room appeared to be a good size but on the night, there was an empty space which could have been used for something.
I would probably get the advice of an event stylist.
I wouldn’t spend money on a cake, it was really pretty but no one really cared.
One thing you wish people told you about planning a wedding?
We had no idea how to plan a reception run sheet. We wished someone had told us to spread out the speeches throughout the night.
Instead, we had planned all speeches and first dance, cake cutting etc, before 8pm. Then we had four hours of dance floor. Which was still so fun but it would have been nice to know what “usually” happens at receptions.
Best advice for other couples planning a wedding?
Invest in a good photographer and get most of your photos taken before the ceremony. It really helped us to relax before the ceremony. I had a motto throughout the planning stage, “Don’t get stressed, get organised!”
Absolutely everything was kept in spreadsheets or on the computer. It really, really helped.
Emotions around changing wedding plans?
It was such a stressful time for us, however once we decided to postpone and set a new date, we felt relieved that we had some time to breathe and really think about the finer details of the wedding.
I did go through a period of mourning, I was so ready to get married.
Mourning and grief followed by a complete lack of motivation exacerbated by the lockdown in March 2020 left us feeling pretty flat.
We just put the wedding plans on hold and focused on our health and relationship.
What helped you get through the stress of changing plans?
We made a pact that whatever happens, we will get married on June 12, 2021. If there was another COVID-19 outbreak, we would just get married with the celebrant.
Advice for other couples whose weddings are impacted by coronavirus?
You are not alone. Join some wedding planning communities on Facebook and talk to others who are also going through the same thing.
Look after your mental health, it’s OK to feel all of the emotions.
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