Queensland tops Aussie cheating charts

Queenslanders are more likely to consider starting an affair compared to the rest of Australia, with new data revealing the state tops the cheating charts nationally. SEE THE FULL LIST

Queensland tops the Aussie cheating charts. Picture: Supplied

Queenslanders are more likely to consider starting an affair compared to the rest of Australia, scandalous new data has revealed.

Based on user registration data from Ashley Madison, a dating service with a focus on affairs, the majority of new users during winter last year were from Queensland.

Canberra topped the charts nationally, however user registrations from Rockhampton, Mackay, Cairns, Toowoomba, Bundaberg, Gold Coast, Townsville, Sunshine Coast and Brisbane contributed to Sunshine State being named as Australia’s affair capital.

Queensland’s cheating hot spots. Picture: Ashley Madison.

People aren’t afraid to openly look for affairs, either, with one recent post on the Reddit community AussieAffairs asking potential partners to reach out and “see where it goes.”

“Right here, average father figure, married for what feels like a million years to someone who doesn’t seem to see them anymore. Love to connect with someone who might be in a similar situation. If you’re feeling like the spark has faded in yours maybe we should get to know each other discreetly,” the post read.

Another Queenslander said they were married but were looking for “extra curricular activities.”

It’s not all sunny for cheaters though, with groups dedicated to snuffing out cheaters on the rise.

A lack of intimacy and communication can lead to a spouse questioning their role in the relationship. Picture: Supplied

Earlier this month a Townsville woman asked the “Are we dating the same girl or guy” Facebook group whether anyone was talking to the person she was dating.

“We’ve been getting serious but lots of red flags. Only wants to come over late at night after he finishes work … doesn’t stay but claims he’s ‘serious’ about me. Won’t let me come to his place either always mine. Past few days he hasn’t come over … starting to think he has a missus. Anyone else talking to him? I’ve gained heaps of feelings for this guy and desperately need answers,” the post read.

The responses were overwhelmingly supportive, with one response encouraging the woman to “trust your gut.”

What are 10 signs of cheating?

Isabella Mise, Senior Director of Communications at Ashley Madison said there were 10 signs your partner may be looking for an affair.

1. They may have expressed an interest in something other than traditional monogamy
“Our core demographic is individuals who have lived quite a life already. They met someone, fell in love, got married, and assumed the default relationship structure of monogamy would see them through. As time goes on, though, they realise that this structure doesn’t work for them and reserving sex and physical intimacy for one person isn’t enough, especially if one partner has lost interest in sex altogether.”

2. They discover other parts of them they want to explore

“Most of the time, having outside relationships is an inward journey and doesn’t have anything to do with the primary partner. Many of our members have realised that having these outside relationships allows them to express different parts of themselves with different people.”

3. They may state all their needs may not be met

“Something that many people learned during lockdown was that it’s unrealistic to rely on one person to consistently serve all of our needs and vice versa. A primary partner nowadays is expected to be a satisfying lover, best friend, co-parent, confidant, etc., and this heightened pressure placed on one person was called into question during the pandemic.”

Relationship problems can lead to spouses looking elsewhere. Picture: iStock

4. They may seem as if they have a lack of interest in sex

“Contrary to popular belief, women get bored with long-term monogamy before men do. A lot of times this translates to a lack of interest in sex with their primary partner which they then perceive to be a lack of interest in sex altogether. They then realise through their affairs they were in need of novelty all along and tackle that by finding other sexual partners and ensuring the variety and frequency is up to par, so boredom is no longer an issue.”

5. They may mention sex has become repetitive

“Sometimes the people within that relationship don’t even realise what else is out there until they step out, and then they learn about kinks, fetishes, positions, etc. that they’ve never tried before. A lot of our members take these back to their primary partner to see if that’s something they can incorporate in their sex life, but the answer is sometimes no. So instead, they go exploring with someone else.”

6. They may express a desire to explore their sexuality

“Many members have outside relationships to explore their sexuality in a discreet way. Maybe they got married before they really got to know themselves, or new desires have come up over the years but their partner can’t or isn’t willing to help them explore.”

7. They may be missing an emotional connection

“Many men have shared that just a simple text or phone conversation with an outside partner is enough to satisfy their needs. Married men crave emotional connections and validation their spouse can’t provide. They desire things as simple as their partner asking how their day was or being praised by them.”

8. They are looking for pleasure

“Women on Ashley Madison are in sexless or orgasmless marriages and are seeking sexual pleasure in their affairs. Women are also more likely to be non-monogamous with their affair partners, whereas men are usually satisfied with just one.”

9. They may feel unattractive

“Women also report a boost in confidence and body positivity after having affairs. Years of unsatisfying and repetitive sex with one person can leave you feeling unattractive or undesirable, but some flirting and a night of reawakened passion can really turn things around and help you see yourself in a new light.”

10. They may suggest an open relationship

“Non-monogamy is on the rise. Many Ashley Madison members and even a portion of the general population believe that society would benefit from a shift toward a more open style of monogamy, where we don’t have to rely on just one person to satisfy all of our emotional and physical needs.”